Redemption of a Lost Soul
by Raven524
Summary: Spoiler Alert: Takes place after 3:16. Sam has lost the battle and Dean has gone to hell but will he stay there?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I still don't own Supernatural or its characters

**Disclaimer:** I _still_ don't own Supernatural or its characters. And I am not making any money on this…I'm just having fun!

**Summary:** Spoiler Alert: Takes place after 3:16. Sam has lost the battle and Dean has gone to hell but will he stay there?

**Redemption of a Lost Soul**

**Chapter 1 – Journey Into Hell**

Time had lost all meaning as Sam Winchester sat on the floor of the dining room, the lifeless body of his brother held tenderly in his embrace. Silent tears fell down ravaged cheeks as a soft keening noise echoed through the silence.

"No Dean—No—I'm so sorry…" Sam repeated over and over while rocking his brother's body. As he closed his eyes, he shivered for a brief moment as he felt something—a sharp pain in his shoulder, something tearing before an echo of a familiar voice went through his mind. _"Saaammmyyy"_

Sam jumped as another voice intruded on his sorrow. "You can still save him Sam—there is still time…" Ruby whispered as she pushed herself to her feet. She swayed for a moment before moving closer to the distraught hunter.

"No, it's too late—too little too late…" Sam remembered his brother's words after his father died. It was the story of his life. He always seemed to be doing too little, too late. "Go away Ruby…leave before I change my mind and send you to join…to join…" Sam couldn't get the words past his lips.

"Fine, but you do have the power to bring him back—just like you had the power to repel Lilith. Mark my words; you will regret not listening to me…" Ruby reached for the knife but stepped back at the look in the hunter's eyes.

"Leave it! I will find the bitch and _I will_ kill her—then maybe you can have it back. Now leave!" Sam stood towering over the petite blonde. He shouldn't let her go, Dean would have—his gaze looked down again and wondered if maybe he should listen to her. But his brother's last words came back to him—a warning to not use the demonic powers that lay dormant inside him.

"Oh, you might want to do something about your friend Bobby—the holy water will only hold them for so long you know. I'd help, but then you're a big boy now…" Ruby held her hand out as Sam took a step towards her with the knife raised. "I'm going—and for what it's worth. I really am sorry about your brother Sam…"

Sam watched as Ruby stormed from the house. His eyes looked out the windows and saw the demons still milling around. He wondered how many of those people could be saved. He shuddered for a moment when the terrified eyes of the innocent girl appeared in his mind. If it hadn't been for Dean…

"Oh God Dean, what am I going to do without you?" Sam fell to his knees again beside his fallen brother. He gently reached forward and closed the eyes that no longer held any sign of life. The vibrant eyes that had gotten him through childhood, seen him through the loss of Jess, helped him when he was wounded and guided him when he was lost—all of it gone in an instant.

Tears fell once more as he gently removed the necklace he had given to his brother. He remembered the smile on Dean's face even though he'd known it was originally for his father. It was Sam's acknowledgement of who really raised him and a sign of his love for the one person who was always there for him.

Sam wiped the tears with the back of his hand and placed the necklace into his pocket. Dean had asked him to take it and to remember the good times. But right now, all he could see was the shredded remains of the ultimate proof of his brother's love.

"God, why?" Sam shouted as he looked skyward for an answer. It had been a long time since he had prayed. After the incident with the angel who turned out to be the spirit of a priest, he'd thought he'd given up on believing in a greater good. However while he was researching for a way out of the deal, he'd read up on other Supernatural beings—beings of good and light who were meant to fight the dark.

A prayer that Pastor Jim had taught him came to his mind. It was a prayer to the Archangel Michael, God's warrior against evil and according to legend, the one who took souls to be judged. It seemed fitting somehow to say it now over the best warrior against evil he'd ever known.

"Saint Michael the Archangel,

defend us in battle;

be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil.

May God rebuke him, we humbly pray:

and do thou, O Prince of the heavenly host,

by the power of God,

cast into hell Satan and all evil spirits

who wander through the world seeking the ruin of souls.

Amen."

Sam wiped the blood from his brother's face with a shaking hand. "I know you don't believe in prayer Dean, but I have to believe that somehow you will be saved. I remember Pastor Jim telling me once that the Righteous Man would be destroyed by evil, but eventually would find peace. I have to believe he was right…I have to believe…" Sam's voice shook once more with the emotions he'd been holding in for an entire year. He felt as if his world had ended and yet, the sound of raised voices outside could no longer be ignored.

"Stay here Dean and rest, I'll be back for you as soon as I kick some demon butt—you'd like that I'm sure." Sam stood and once more looked at what was going on outside. Without Lilith, the demons seemed to be confused but none of them were leaving. His eyes spied something that might work parked just a few houses down. "Perfect!" Sam muttered as he picked up the knife and began to search for what he'd need. A short time later he left with a small tape recorder in his pocket.

Maybe it was Ruby's mojo bag that he still carried and maybe it was whatever had saved him from Lilith's wrath—but somehow he managed to get to the ice cream truck without being seen. So far he hadn't seen Bobby anywhere, but then his friend was probably staying out of sight. He quickly placed a thick layer of salt around the inside of the large van, making a circle of protection around himself. He'd be screwed if the salt didn't stay, but then he really didn't care if he died anyway…

"Well Dean, I'm sure this plan is gonna suck, but then you wanted me to do it the way you and Dad would—so here we go!" Sam placed the cassette player next to the external microphone on the truck and pressed play. He turned up the volume as high as it would go and then pressed on the gas. Before long he was surrounded by the demon hoard as they tried to get to him.

A grim smile crossed his lips as he remembered what Dean said after the last time they were under siege. "Well let's hope this ends better than Dawn of the Dead big brother!" Sam said out loud, feeling some comfort just talking as if his brother really could hear him.

He heard the loud shrieks and watched as the people fell to the ground screaming. The Latin exorcism echoed into the still night air. Sam pulled the knife and waited, prepared if one of the demons broke through, but the salt seemed to be doing the trick. He watched as one after the other, the demonic black smoke poured from the mouths of the infected. Soon the air was silent.

For a brief moment a chill went down Sam's spine. He had just sent a new hoard of demons to hell—to torment his brother. He sat down heavily into the seat as the realization of what he was doing each time he sent one of the bastards to hell. How could he continue?

Sam jumped as something pounded on the driver side door. He turned, knife raised to strike. "Whoa there boy, why don't you put that pig sticker down…" Bobby gasped as he backed up slightly with his hands raised.

"Christo!" Sam said as he opened the door. He saw no reaction, but he still pulled a bottle of holy water from his pocket. Taking a deep sip first, he passed it to Bobby who also drank.

"Smart thinking boy—but how the hell did you get them all to come to you?" Bobby asked as he looked at the people around them. Some were beginning to stir and moan.

"Who cares Bobby—let's just get Dean and get out of here before we have to answer questions…" Sam stood and moved past Bobby, his steps hurried towards the house and what was left of his brother.

As the two hunters entered the dining room, Sam stopped dead. Bobby ran into him and almost knocked them both over. "What the hell Sam?" Bobby croaked as he righted himself.

"Dean—he was right here Bobby and now he's gone—I mean his body is…" Sam saw the outline of blood where the body had laid just a short time ago. His eyes grew hard as he quickly turned and began to search the house. However other than finding the frightened family in the basement, there was no sign of his brother's body.

"Bobby, what the hell?" Sam cried, looking to his old friend for some kind of explanation.

"I don't know Sam—I just don't know. But we gotta get before the cops come—come on boy, we'll figure this out later…" Bobby pulled at the young hunter's arm, guiding him back towards the area where they'd hidden the car and truck. "Come on Sam—won't do us any good to get caught…"

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

"So he's passed the test, how much longer will Dean have to suffer?" A soft feminine voice whispered on the wind.

"Our boys have done well Mary, don't you worry. It will all work out." John answered.

"I'm so sorry that Sam had to be the one—but without Dean, I'm not so sure he can resist going down the wrong path. The temptation to give in and allow his powers to fully emerge—to embrace them even in the name of good—most men would take the easy road John."

"Yes, but most men aren't Winchesters. We have to believe in our boys Mary—this is their fight now. Sam has too much good in him to let evil win. And Dean, well if things go as planned, he will be there to shield our youngest once more. Our time and our role are done. I just wish I had been able to tell them more…" John's voice broke.

"They know how much you loved them—as for the rest, they will find out just like we did, once their job is done." Mary grabbed her husband's hand in her own and smiled.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The hooks in his body were excruciating. Dean could feel them pulling at sinew and bone as he swayed over the empty black void. He could hear the sound of tortured voices below him as his own cries joined them. The voices of the damned—but surely there was more to hell than this?

Of course anyone who knew Dean would realize his fear of being alone. Maybe hell was each person's own making, maybe if he became afraid of hot chicks and warm beaches the scenery would change. Another scream broke free as tears coursed down his bloodied face. The pain was getting worse the longer he hung here. Why didn't someone come?

"Sammy! Please help me!" Dean cried again. He had to believe his brother would find a way to save him. It couldn't be too late—he refused to turn into a demon or worse. He wouldn't turn into something that may eventually kill that which he sacrificed so much to save.

He looked around again and wondered when the party would start. Dean thought for sure he'd see the bitch who sent him here or maybe Meg—she certainly had a score to settle with him. Hell, there were so many who had promised to tear the flesh from his bones, why wasn't there a line?

"Because Dean, you have yet to be fully judged…" A voice spoke quietly off to his right. Dean tried to look through the darkness, but he couldn't find the source of the sound.

"Great, now I'm hearing things…" Dean said as another scream was wrenched from his bloody lips. The hooks were being pulled further apart, tearing his flesh. "Oh God, make it stop, please…Sammy!"

"Now you might want to rethink who to call for here son. You have a chance to find peace, but only if you believe…remember Isiah 57:1 Dean?"

"_The righteous perisheth, and no man layeth it to heart: and merciful men are taken away, none considering that the righteous is taken away from the evil to come."_

"What the hell does that mean? How about the cliff note version pal…" Dean ground out as he tried to ride out the pain in his body. He remembered Pastor Jim trying to get him to read the bible, but he never had the patience. He believed in what he could see…

He heard a deep laugh as the voice continued. "Even now you fight against evil, but for how long? Your will is strong Dean, but I fear hell will eventually beat you. As to what the verse means, let me see if I can put this in terms you'll understand." There was a slight pause which made Dean think the thing had left, but then the voice sounded again. "Oh yes, if you are judged to be a good man, a righteous man, you may receive a get out of jail free card…"

Dean groaned. It had to be another demon trick. "No more deals. You can do what you want with me—I won't give you evil sons of bitches anything else…"

"That's right, you're a realist. You can believe in the many different forms of evil in the world and yet you can't believe there is equal good?" The voice continued.

Dean thought back to the man who had been killed by the pipe. At that time, he had felt like there had been something good winning out over evil. He'd even told Sam about it when his brother was having his own crisis of faith. And then there was the whole good vampire, bad vampire thing. There were degrees of evil so maybe there were degrees of good. Unfortunately, none of that would help him now as he let another scream of agony past his lips.

"That's right Dean, you understand there is a balance and right now that balance has been upset. The war has arrived and your brother is smack in the middle of it. I wonder if he will survive?"

"Who are you?" Dean finally asked. He couldn't revisit the whole leaving Sam alone to fight evil thing. It was all his fault. He never thought his decision through when he made the deal. Bobby was right, nothing good ever came from making a deal with a demon.

There was soft laughter and Dean could have sworn the pain in his body lessened as he felt a glow of something caress his battered body. "You can call me Mike for now. I think you and I are going to become good allies Dean Winchester—yes, you certainly make things more interesting…"

TBC

Raven524: Okay here is the newest story. I've been in shock since the ending of Season 3, but I think I'm finally coming out of it (Not Dean!). I know this has been done, but thought I'd put my spin on what happens after Dean (sniffles) ends up in hell (damn Kripke). There is a slight religious overtone here in the beginning, but don't worry it won't be predominant in this story. I hope you all enjoy it!


	2. Chapter 2 Moving On

**Disclaimer:** I _still_ don't own Supernatural or its characters. I and am not making any money on this…I'm just having fun!

**Redemption of a Lost Soul**

**Chapter 2 – Moving On**

Sam parked next to Bobby's truck at the hotel. They'd both decided to stay in the area until they could figure out what had happened to Dean's body. As he reached for the keys, he let his head fall onto the steering wheel. His eyes closed as the reality of his failure struck home. The night sky rumbled and lightening flashed as the very sky reflected the terrible sorrow contained within the Impala's womb.

"Oh God Dean—I'm so sorry…" Sam whispered again as tears formed but this time refused to fall. He felt something inside him break that he knew would never heal no matter how much time passed. A part of Sam Winchester had died along with his brother tonight. He jumped as the driver's door opened and strong arms reached in to guide him from the car.

"Come on Sam—you know he wouldn't want you to do this…" Bobby said softly as he placed a comforting arm around Sam's waist. The smell of motor oil and gun oil surrounded him, but offered him little reprieve. He longed for the scent of leather that belonged to the only one who could heal him—the one who was now gone because of him.

The young hunter couldn't respond. He didn't deserve sympathy. Another loved one was dead because of his destiny. There would be no one to pull him back now, no one to save him if he turned. The weight of the world bowed the once strong shoulders as Sam allowed himself to be lead. He had not purpose, no reason to fight—and yet he knew he had to find a way to go on.

If he didn't, the sacrifices made for him would be for nothing. But it was the last sacrifice—the life of his brother that froze his heart and solidified his belief that Dean had been right. There was no ultimate good or being to come to the rescue. The good and innocent suffered and died while those who sacrificed so much to protect the innocent ended up in hell. How could there be a just God if his brother was allowed to go to hell trying to save him?

Sam blinked as he felt himself pushed down onto the end of a bed. How had he gotten here? A glass was placed in his hand along with a couple of white pills. He looked up for a brief moment and saw his own pain reflected in older eyes. "You need sleep Sam—I promised Dean I would look out for you…"

"I don't need help—I don't want…" Sam started to argue but stopped when he saw the effect his words were having on the older man. He didn't deserve his anger, shouldn't have to take up the burden that had been born for so long on his brother's sturdy shoulders. He didn't want to turn into the shell that he'd become after the Trickster had killed Dean on that Wednesday. So he swallowed and tried to temper his words. "I'm sorry Bobby, I know you lost him too—I just—I need to be alone ok?"

Bobby nodded, his cheeks wet with tears as he turned to leave the room. The man had aged this night, his steps slower than usual. "I'll be next door if you need me Sam. Get some sleep because we need to start working on finding the bitch who caused this mess…"

"Yeah—and Bobby?" Sam watched as the old hunter turned. "Thanks…"

"Just go to sleep you idjit!" Bobby replied with a small smile on his face as he left the room.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Lilith fumed as she paced the floor of the living room in the dilapidated old house. She had the young Winchester right where she wanted him and yet her powers had not worked. Worse still, the young whelp had managed to send her followers back to hell—all of them! She'd taken his protector from him and used his soul as bait to draw him to her and yet he still lived.

She had carefully set the trap and even allowed the fool hunter to locate her using his ancient magic. It should have worked. According to her sources, Sam Winchester had not shown any signs of using his latent powers. The young pup had no idea the powers he could wield and yet he'd defeated her without conscious thought. She had been right to fear the would be King. If he ever got control—the demon shuddered at the thought.

She paused for a moment as her reflection showed in the window in front of her. A smile formed on the handsome face staring back at her but the green eyes were no longer filled with the joy of living. It had been a long time since she'd taken on a masculine form, but this one was pleasing to her. Even more so as she realized the pain it would cause the younger one. She may have lost her minions for now, but she had the prize. Dean Winchester would still be the means to kill the demon spawn.

The ancient demon looked down at the torn flesh, relishing the agony the oldest Winchester had suffered at the hands of her pets. But now she had to repair the damage. Her eyes turned white as the body she now inhabited glowed with her power. It took only a few moments to repair what had been so utterly destroyed.

Unlike other lowly demons, she had the power to heal the bodies of those whose souls she had taken. She'd done it more than once in the past and enjoyed using them. To anyone else, Dean Winchester would be alive—but he no longer had that which made him Dean—he no longer had his soul. Once she tired of him, the body would die once more or she could pass it on to another of those who served her.

The idea had come to her in the moments before her escape. She would torture the youngest with hope—hope his brother could somehow return unscathed. Then she would lure him into another trap, this time though she would be sure of the outcome. He might be able to withstand her demonic power and charms but he still was human and as such could be killed. She just needed to bide her time and wait. It was something the ancient demon was skilled at doing.

"Your time will come Sam Winchester—but for now I will have to be satisfied with another Winchester being tortured in the pit. Yes, that is more than enough for now." Lilith turned to the man standing silently behind her. "Get our things, we must move before they locate us again."

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Sam sat at the small table and continued to stare at the computer screen in front of him. The white pills Bobby had given him were still lying on the bed side table. He'd tried to rest, but his mind was too full of his brother's final words and moments.

"_I won't let you go to Hell Dean!"_

"_Yes you are—yes you are. I'm sorry—I mean this is all my fault—I know that. But what you're doing isn't goin' to save me—it's only going to kill you."_

"_What am I supposed to do?"_

"_Keep fighting—take care of my wheels. Sam remember what Dad taught you okay—and remembers what I taught you…"_

The young hunter wiped the tears from his cheeks as he tried to close out the memory of the rest, his brother's battered body lying limp in his arms. "I don't know what to do Dean—I don't know if I can do this without you. Damn you—we were supposed to go down together, not like this…" His closed fist hit the table with enough force to knock the glass of water over.

Sam quickly moved the laptop out of harms way. As he mopped up the mess with a bathroom towel, the hopelessness of the situation assailed him. "I'm only one man Dean. How can I win this war? I don't know how to go on without you…"

The young hunter's eyes looked at the bed where his brother had laid just the night before. The pillow still held the indent from his head, the covers thrown to the floor in true Dean fashion. A soft sob struggled to make its way past his lips, but Sam refused to allow it to surface. He moved towards the bed and lifted the pillow to his face for a moment. Gun oil, sweat and Dean's cologne clung to the fibers and brought fresh tears. "Oh God Dean, I can't do it. I'm not strong enough. What did you think I would do once you were gone?"

"_Let's kick some demon ass for as long as we can Sammy…"_ Dean's face flashed in his mind as his words continued to provide guidance.

"Ok Dean—I'll do it for as long as I'm able—for you…" Sam said quietly as he stood and gently replaced the pillow on the bed. He realized his father's journal must still be in the car. He'd seen Dean putting it in the trunk earlier. The young hunter grabbed the keys and headed out to retrieve it.

His hand traced the lines of the black car as he moved to open the trunk. "Well looks like it's just you and me girl. Argh! Man as soon as I get some down time, this trunk needs to be organized. How he found things in here…" Sam stood back as his hands brushed against soft leather. He gulped as he pulled his brother's leather coat from the trunk. Dean had obviously left his most treasured things behind for him.

With shaking hands he pulled the coat to him, drawing in the scent of both of the men who had worn it before. How many times had his big brother used the jacket to shelter him? Memories of all the ways Dean had been there for him surfaced only to leave a bitter taste in his mouth. He'd never really gotten a chance to return the favor—to be there for Dean. He'd failed when his big brother had needed him the most.

The young hunter shook his head, no longer wanting to be reminded how he hadn't been able to save the one person who had given up everything for him. As he continued to search the trunk, his memories turned to the other man who had worn the coat. Visions of the strong arms of his father as they carried him to bed when he was younger filled his mind. It contrasted with the memories of the hard man who had formed his later years. The drill sergeant who had always pushed for him to do more—to be better.

The youngest Winchester still regretted the way things had ended with him. He now understood the darkness that had formed the man into the one he fought. He never doubted his love only his methods. Unfortunately, Sam realized too late his father had been right all along. He'd been too soft for the cruelty and evil in this world. His softness is what had put Dean in the position he ended up in. All he had to do was kill Jake and none of this would be happening. No devils gate would have been opened and more importantly his brother would be by his side.

"I'm sorry Dad…" Sam whispered as he reached in to grab his father's journal. He carefully folded the jacket and placed it back inside the Impala. It was where it was meant to be—a part of his past.

For now he needed to somehow find a way to move into the future. A future that would have to be faced alone and would almost surely be short. He wouldn't break his unspoken promise to Dean. He would not unleash the powers that obviously still were dormant within—the bomb waiting to explode as Ruby put it.

Sam stood and squared his shoulders. All emotion was pushed back as his face transformed into a similar mask to the one his brother and father always wore. He would fight the good fight and go down swinging. Then maybe, in the end—he would get to join his brother since it was obvious he was never meant for anything else but hell.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Dean was no longer chained, but the wounds on his body never seemed to heal. They continued to fester and ache causing a new level of anguish for him. He'd lost track of all time as it no longer had any meaning for him. He would never see the one thing that had given his life meaning—his brother Sam was lost to him for eternity.

The loneliness was the worst. He'd never liked being alone when he had lived and now the thought of never being with anyone else for all eternity was almost too much for him to bear. He comforted himself with his memories—some had faded and he figured if Ruby was right, soon they would all fade. But for now, he held onto them with all his might. If Ruby had managed to keep some of her humanity—then he would find a way to do it as well.

Occasionally a demon would arrive in the darkened room to taunt him. A few had even played with him, causing him unbelievable pain. He'd learned to refuse any sustenance as the few times food or water appeared; he became violently ill after eating and drinking. It was if his insides were being eaten by acid. No it was better to put up with the constant hunger and thirst. After all, it wasn't like he would die from it.

However, he'd gotten to the point where he almost looked forward to their visits, no matter how much pain the demons inflicted. It was during those times he would no longer be alone and sometimes he'd hear news of his little brother. The last demon who had stopped by let it slip that there were others who would love to have a piece of his hide—but they were afraid.

It seems his little brother had been kicking some major demon ass in his absence. But apparently before he sent them back to hell, he warned them what he would do to them if they hurt his big brother. Those who still believed Sam held the key to the dark underworld heeded his little brother's orders. It was a comfort to realize his little brother hadn't forgotten him. But as the number of demons who had been sent back increased, he couldn't help but worry. How much longer could Sam stand alone?

Unfortunately for Dean, there were still a few who believed Lilith would win in the end. These were the ones who called on him to torment him. But he would endure it for an eternity if it meant his brother was still alive and still fighting. He only regretted leaving Sam behind, never the sacrifice he'd made. If it meant Sam would live one more day, he'd make the deal again.

Dean started as a soft light seemed to break through the darkness that constantly surrounding him. He blinked as the light grew brighter and a familiar voice echoed in the room. "That kind of thinking is what got you here in the first place. I thought you would have figured it out by now, but maybe Sam really is the smart one. He had a chance to make a deal, twice and he refused. You would do well to remember that in the future Dean." There was a pause before the voice continued. "So how are you doing young hunter?"

"Hey Mikey, long time no chat…but you know what, I'm going to have to get back to you in a bit—my five o'clock flogging is due in about ten minutes." Dean winced as he tried to get his aching body to stand. After a few moments, he gave up. What difference did it make; he had no way to fight and no way to leave. He had always known Sam was the stronger one. He deserved to be here didn't he?

"Now that kind of thinking will only lead to despair Dean. Where is that Winchester pride? Your father never gave up trying to find his way out and back to you boys—are you any less his son?"

Dean sat up straighter at the mention of his father's name. He had almost forgotten—but not quite. He remembered a soft smile and the joy in his father's eyes as he disappeared in a flash of light after helping them defeat the yellow eyed demon. "You knew my father?"

"Quite well actually. He didn't believe in the power of good either. But in the end, I think I convinced him…"

"But how? How did he escape?" Dean leaned forward towards the light. For some reason he felt no fear from the glowing being in front of him. Was it possible—did Angles really exist?

Soft laughter sounded around him and he swore he felt a strong hand clap him on the shoulder. "Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus—and yes Dean, there are Angels."

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

_**Six months later…**_

"Sam you need to stop son, you need to take a rest…" Bobby's voice shouted through the cell phone.

"I can't Bobby—even with the other hunters helping, there are still too many of them roaming around free. Don't worry about me Bobby. I'll be fine." Sam said softly as he glanced out the windshield of the Impala. The darkness of the night suited his mood as the Impala roared through the countryside taking him to his next fight.

"So where are you off to now?" Bobby asked with resignation in his voice.

Sam smiled fondly. While he had refused to hunt with anyone else after Dean's death, he still followed the rule of making sure he had back up. He always checked in with Bobby every couple of days and made sure the old hunter knew where he was heading. "I'm checking out that vampire nest we discussed. Shouldn't take me too long to finish them up and then I heard about some strange deaths up north of here. I'll call you once I'm done…"

"Take care of yourself Sam or so help me…" Bobby's voice was cut off as Sam closed the phone. He already knew the speech by heart and didn't need to be reminded he wasn't taking care of himself. He ran a hand through his hair and winced at the pull of stitches still not healed from the last fight. Bobby had wanted him to stay with him, but he had refused. He was going to take down as many evil sons of bitches as he could even while he spent the rest of his time trying to figure out a way to save Dean.

The last six months had taken a toll on him. They had spent the first week after Dean's death looking for his body but there had been no trace. Bobby thought maybe one of the demons had taken it while Sam was outside, or maybe even Lilith. It killed Sam to think maybe the demon had somehow taken over his brother's body. It would have been the final defeat for his proud brother—to have his body used for evil.

However, it wasn't long before Sam found himself pulled back into the role of hunter. He hadn't been quite as obsessed like he'd been when the Trickster had killed Dean. No, he managed to hold onto some of his humanity still and maybe he did learn something after all. He kept Bobby close, but no one else.

Ellen had called a few times and offered to help; even Joshua had tried to hook up with him. But Sam couldn't hunt with anyone else. He still woke up at night and looked towards the empty bed by the door, expecting to hear his big brother's soft snores. How many times had he called out, only to hear no answer? God how he missed his brother's snarky comments—Sam quickly put in one of Dean's favorite tapes to dispel the somber mood.

It had been six months today since Dean's death. Six months of one hunt after another, of looking for Lilith with no success. She was keeping a low profile, but Sam knew she was still out there—waiting for him to stumble. More than once he'd survived attacks by demons sent by her to kill him. The target was still firmly attached to his back. But this time he was not going to let someone else get in the way of the bullet. If anyone died, it would be him.

Then of course there was Ruby. She had contacted him more than once, offering to show him how to use his powers to locate and get rid of Lilith. At least she no longer tried to convince him he could bring Dean back. As hard as it had been, he refused to give in to the temptation. Dean was right; he needed to avoid using his powers even if it was for a good cause. It was his freaky powers that had called this curse upon his family, nothing good had ever come of them.

The trouble was, sometimes his powers would just pop up. Like the time he threw a Rawhead across the room with enough force to break its neck or the visions he'd had that lead him to some of the demons. And of course, the fact that sometimes demonic powers didn't affect him was also disconcerting. But in the end, Sam chose not to investigate how to release or use his demon given powers. Instead, he ignored them and continued to fight the way his father and brother taught him.

It was harder and normally resulted in him being injured. But down deep he had to believe it was what his brother had wanted him to do. He hadn't been able to save Dean but he could try to make sure his sacrifice wasn't in vain. Besides, the truth was the thought of having enough power to scare a demon like Lilith truly scared him. He still wasn't sure he could avoid the destiny laid before him by the yellow eyed demon, but he was sure going to try.

Some nights he found it difficult to sleep as visions of his brother's suffering flowed through his mind. He could feel the pain and agony as if it was happening to him. He heard his brother's cries for him to help, but in the end he would wake up and then have to face another day with the knowledge his brother suffered because of him.

Sam shook his head as he pulled into the hotel parking lot in the small town. He'd have to wait until morning to attack the nest. It was too dangerous to attempt at nightfall. Besides, he'd have to score some dead man's blood. As he pulled his gear from the trunk he smiled at the organized weapons. "Dean would have a fit if he saw you now girl!"

Shortly after Dean's death he'd found a letter in the glove box. His brother had left him with coordinates to various banks around the country. During his last year when Sam thought he'd been fooling around, his brother had been building a small stock pile of money. He wasn't rich, but he wouldn't have to hustle for money for quite a while.

He'd spent some time afterwards storing some of Dean's things in his father's storage locker and then organizing the weapons bay in the trunk. Just like his father, the weapons were all neatly arranged. The car gleamed both inside and out. Sam spent some of his down time at Bobby's learning how to care for the old girl. It was his way of getting close to his brother again. Sam ran his hand over the dash with a soft smile. "We miss him don't we girl?"

While he had changed some things, others he'd left the same. He still rented a room with two beds and always slept in the one furthest from the door. He had kept and even replaced some of the cassettes in Dean's collection. He could have installed a CD player, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Metallica and AC/DC would continue to play as long as he owned the car. The only song he never had the heart to play was the Bon Jovi song they had shared that last night. The memory was still painful. The regret at the lost moment to let his brother know how he really felt about him ate away at him.

Shouldering his bag he quickly entered the room and closed the door on his memories. It was time to get ready for the next hunt. It was time to focus on ridding the world of one more evil and hopefully saving another innocent life. Dean was right; saving people was really the only thing that kept him going now; that and his need to avenge his brother's death by finding and killing Lilith.

A few hours later he'd returned after securing the dead man's blood and a six pack of beer. Sitting on the bed, he wearily got undressed before pulling out the first can. He looked at the empty bed and sighed as he sipped the beer. "I miss you so much Dean—I don't know how much longer I can do this—I know you wanted me to go on—but it's just so hard…"

Tears fell down his face as he started on the second can of beer. The loss of Jess and his father had been bad, but this—he felt as if there was a hole growing inside him and if he wasn't careful, he'd disappear.

For a brief moment he wondered what would happen if he took the keys to the dark kingdom. Would he be able to release Dean from hell? Maybe Ruby was right, he could still save Dean from an eternity of pain and suffering. But then his brother's words echoed in his mind.

"_Remember what I taught you…"_

Dean had taught him that trading one evil for another, even if done with the best intentions only lead to disaster for both of them. He raised his beer in a silent toast to the man who should be sleeping in the other bed. "I'll keep my promise Dean. God help me, I'll find a way to save you—but I won't do it by dealing with demons."

Sam jumped as his cell phone rang. He flipped it open expecting it to be Bobby checking in on him again. He knew the man was worried about him—especially today. But his breath caught in his throat as a voice from the past spoke to him.

"Sammy—help me please!"

TBC

Raven524: Well here is the second chapter to this rather angsty piece. Don't worry, Dean will be making more of an appearance real soon. Afterall we can't leave him down below much longer can we?


	3. Chapter 3 Answers

Disclaimer: I still don't own Supernatural or its characters

**Disclaimer:** I _still_ don't own Supernatural or its characters. I and am not making any money on this…I'm just having fun!

**Redemption of a Lost Soul**

**Chapter 3 – Answers**

"So let me get this straight—you're my Guardian Angel? Don't get me wrong, but shouldn't your job be finished now?" Dean tried to see through the glowing light that undulated in front of him. He could almost hear Sam's _"I told you so…"_ in his mind as he grappled with accepting what Mike had told him.

"I never said I was your Guardian Angel Dean. But believe me; she is still very much on the job even now." Mike said softly.

"She? Hey, is she hot? I mean seriously Dude; tell me she's not grandma Moses…" Dean remarked, his mind reeling with the information that Angels apparently did exist. The next thing he knew, he'd see a unicorn fly by with a rainbow shooting out of its ass.

This time the room was filled with loud laughter. "Winchester, you know I've judged many who have been in your position and I have to say, none of them were able to maintain so much of their personality for as long as you have. The light within you cannot be extinguished by darkness—something Lilith has forgotten."

"What do you mean? Who are you?" Dean asked again, this time hoping for an answer. He enjoyed his talks with Mike, but in the end he was always left alone. The suffering unending except for the brief moments of light the 'angel' provided. And why did the guy bother anyway? He was stuck here for an eternity.

"I am the Archangel Michael, God's warrior and judge. We fight the same battle Dean; we both fight evil and save the innocent. You while you lived saved many innocent lives. Your sacrifice has not gone unnoticed and will not go unrewarded."

Dean shook his head as he sat up straighter. For the first time in what seemed like forever, he felt something new building inside him—hope. Pastor Jim had always tried to convince him that there were beings of good and light to help fight the darkness. But he just hadn't been able to accept it. Why hadn't the good beings saved his Mother? Why had Jim died at the hands of a demon and his father…"So you helped my Dad escape—just in time to save my butt. But yet you allowed all those demons to escape, why?"

"There are rules Dean, the demons would have escaped regardless of whether your Dad was there or not. The demon had found someone that he could control through the powers he'd given him. Luckily the door was closed again, but unfortunately a number of strong demons have now escaped into your world. There is no longer a single demon in charge, but many who vie for the role. It could tear the world apart unless someone can restore the balance."

"Sam? You expect one man to save the world? You gotta be kiddin' me. One man can't make that much of a difference…." Dean remarked as he tried to figure out if the being in front of him was really who he said he was. It didn't make sense.

"But one man did Dean. Your father made a difference; he prevented the demon from getting what he wanted even though he tried many times after your mother's death. When your mother and her relatives were taken early by the demon, your father stepped up admirably to the challenge of preparing you and Sam. Even in the end his wish made a difference and helped to defeat Azazel. This is why I orchestrated his greatest wish in return for his service during his life. "

"His greatest wish?" Dean paused as part of the angel's comments hit him. "Wait, what did my mother have to do with this?" He remembered her strange apology to Sam when they had gone back to Lawrence to handle the poltergeist in their old home.

There was a sigh before Michael continued. "Your father's only wish was to see his sons one more time and to be there at their greatest hour of need to help. He has now found peace with your mother." Mike moved closer, the light dimming slightly but not losing any of its warmth. "Your mother was part of the previous generation. She was the protector and her sister Samantha was the demon's target. Just as her father Samuel was the target for his generation and his brother was the protector. Your brother was named for him, he carries the psychic power that flows through your blood line. Each had the power…"

"Wait, my blood line? You mean to tell me Sam was destined to become some kind of bridge between demons and humans?" Dean stood and began to pace. "I don't believe it. There isn't an evil bone in Sam's body. I don't believe in destiny, we make our own choices not some unseen good or evil."

"You don't understand Dean. Sam was not of the demon, but of God. The demon is drawn to the pure of heart like a moth to the flame. He tries to corrupt that which is good, it is his way. Demon's have haunted your family for generations, since Samuel Colt first figured out a way to keep the portals from hell to earth closed."

"I don't believe you. Why wouldn't Dad have told me—us? My mother never would have kept something like this from him…" Dean felt a chill at the ramifications of what he was being told.

There was silence and Dean thought maybe Michael had left him again. But the light increased until it blinded him. He held his hand in front of his eyes as he tried to see what the Archangel was trying to do. "Hey, can you tone it down a bit?"

"Dean…" The hunter fell to his knees as he saw two faces he never thought he'd see again. "Mom—Dad—how?"

"Michael thought you would rather hear this from us son." John said as he moved to grab his son. "It's good to see you!"

"Dean, I'm so sorry but I never understood—not all of it anyway." Mary began as she also hugged her son. She looked at her husband and smiled at his nod. "When Samantha died and I hadn't seen any signs, well I thought the demon was gone. I thought Samantha had beat him when she refused to do his bidding."

"I have an Aunt?" Dean asked in wonder. He'd never known much about his extended family other than there had been an Uncle somewhere. "How did she die?"

"That's not important." Mary sighed as she smiled softly at Dean. "What is important is you finally managed to kill Azazel and you boys stopped hell from escaping to earth—at least most of it."

"So why is Michael talking like the war isn't over?" Dean looked at his father who had remained quiet.

"Unfortunately some mean sons of bitches managed to escape. I tried to keep them back, but they were too strong. Sam can stand up to them; just like he did with Lilith." John smiled at Dean. "He really did us proud Dean."

"So he's immune to demon attacks? How can that be? He's been hurt by lesser demons than Lilith." Dean said as he remembered their run in with the demon in the cellar. Sam had been thrown into the windshield and had sported more than one bruised rib.

"He's not immune Dean—he's still human. But he has certain powers that can protect him." John continued.

"Great and I told him not to use them—he's going to get killed because of me." Dean shook his head and looked away. "I let him down—I let you down Dad, I'm sorry. I tried to save him, but in the end I just threw him to the wolves."

"You did your best Dean. I know what it's like to try to protect those you love. My whole family, my friends, everyone who ever knew me was killed. The demon was trying to erase our blood line—to have it end with Sam. I tried to stop him, but you did stop him. You should be proud son." Mary said softly as she placed her arm through John's.

"You have nothing to be ashamed of Dean—but you can't give up. You have to go back; you have to protect Sam, save him from the temptations the demons will throw at him. The lure of power is a great corruptor son. He is in great danger as is all of the world if he should be turned." John shook his head. "I meant what I said Dean, if you can't save him, you will have to destroy him."

"No! How can you ask me to do that?" Dean raged as he moved towards his father. "You can't put that on me—at least not anymore. I failed remember—I made the deal that landed me here."

"We have to go now Dean. You take care of yourself and Sammy…" Mary said softly as she kissed his forehead.

"You heard your mother—you be strong son." John hugged Dean one more time before he stepped back.

"Wait!" Dean tried to reach out to his parents.

"Both your mother and father have served their roles, but yours is yet unfinished. You still have much good to do in the world Dean Winchester…" Michael's voice returned as his father and mother began to fade from view. Dean felt a warmth spreading through his body as the wounds began to heal.

Dean smiled; his father and mother had found some peace. At least his fear that his Dad had gone back to hell was alleviated. "I'm glad they found each other…"

"But how?" Dean asked softly, part of him refused to believe he might get his greatest wish. There had been too many times he'd allowed himself to hope, only to have it shot down by some form of evil. He remembered how he'd felt the past year before his death.

He hadn't lied to Sam. He was tired. He'd been fighting evil and protecting those he loved for so long, he'd felt as if he was drowning in it. He remembered thinking he deserved to be in hell because the evil he fought seemed to be oozing from every pore of his body. And then he'd gone into the dream world to save Bobby.

Part of him even now rebelled at the idea that he belonged here. He didn't deserve to be in hell and he knew it. But that knowledge still hadn't saved him. All it did now was cause him more pain. And now Mike had given him hope again. Dean sighed as he looked up at the glowing figure that now seemed to fill the black void around him. "I made the deal and I won't risk losing Sam by recanting it. So tell me Michael, how do I go back?"

"Lilith has prepared the way through her own greed and overconfidence. Even now she seeks to trap your brother, but her evil will not be able to harm him. In the end, if your brother can defeat her—you will be able to return and continue the fight."

"What do you mean if Sam defeats her? I won't do anything to risk my brother so if that's part of the deal, you can just leave me here…" Dean backed away from the light.

"You don't understand Dean; the future is always in motion. Your past has already set you and your brother on the path. Your family, it was not just a random act. For generations those in your blood line have fought, each being tested and always found equal to the task."

"Yeah, Yeah, I got the whole Sam and I are part of some grand master plan. Why doesn't the big guy just cut out the middle man here and end this before more innocent people get hurt—before…" Dean didn't want to voice his secret fear. The one thing that had caused him more pain than anything the demons had thrown at him. He couldn't lose his brother to the darkness. They had lost too much already.

"Because of free will, there is only so much we can do to intercede. Your brother has so far been able to avoid the temptations that would lead to darkness. But he still could turn and take his place at the head of the demon table. If that happens, more than you know can be lost." Mike said softly as he moved closer to the hunter once more.

"Sam will never go dark side—I know my brother…" Dean said with conviction.

"That may be, but even now without your guidance he teeters on the edge. It won't take much for him to give in and take the power the demons hold out to him. He was the child sought by darkness but because of you and your father, he is still a child of light. The darkness tries to snuff out the light and without someone to protect and feed that light, it may go out."

"So let me get this straight—Sam's powers come from the demon and if he uses them he goes to hell?" Dean asked as he slowly stood to face the light. None of this made any sense to him.

"Not exactly, but few are able to resist the temptations that come with the amount of power your brother carries inside. What is right and what is wrong is not always clear. He almost gave in when the temptress held your soul out for him. The use of his power to bring you back would have been against the natural law—it would have been the first step towards his absolute corruption. You were a test Dean and your brother passed it because of you."

Dean paused as he remembered Sam's plea to allow him to use his powers to save him. He shuddered when he realized how close his little brother had come to disaster. "But if he unleashes his power, can't he simply use it for good—to banish the evil back to where it belongs?"

"No, Dean—even Sam would not be able to control it. In the end, he would fulfill the destiny set before him by the demon and serve evil. Tell me, if you have the power over life and death—who would you chose to live and who should die?"

Dean remembered how Jake had acted once he embraced the full power that had been given to him. Sam had told him before he accepted the demon's offer, he'd been a soldier and a good guy. "Ok, I understand—using powers is bad. But they seem to happen without him being able to control them—isn't that more dangerous?" Dean asked.

"No, that is merely defensive in nature. Your brother may be able to harness some of his powers and find them useful to fight. In fact, he will need to harness some of them in order to fight the evil that has been released. There are many in this world that have abilities and some serve good as well as evil. But your brother has a power that should never be released—it is this power that draws the darkness to him like a moth to a flame."

Dean sat back down and dropped his head into his hands. "You're tempting me now aren't you—trying to get me to go back is against the natural order. What's dead should stay dead right? So why don't you just take your light show and leave me alone. I can't help Sam anymore and what you're telling me—it isn't making this any easier…" Dean looked up again; maybe the being in front of him was a demon in disguise. The pain he felt now was almost worse than what he'd suffered so far.

"I'm not a demon son and this is not a trick. Lilith has restored your body to full health in order to use it to lure your brother to her. She is hoping your brother will be fooled long enough for her to kill him. Since your body is technically not dead—it is a simple matter of returning you to it once she is gone. Lilith's death will nullify her hold over your soul and you will be freed. As long as your body lives, you may return." Mike said softly.

"But what if she kills Sam?" Dean asked as a shudder went through him. He didn't want to go back if his brother was gone. He wasn't as strong as Sam.

A warm hand on his shoulder brought him out of his thoughts. "You are stronger than you know Dean. It was not chance that your family was chosen—all of you have the strengths needed to succeed. But in answer to your question, if Lilith wins—I will judge you to be a Righteous Man and as such will allow you to join your mother and father."

"But what happens to Sammy?" Dean whispered.

"That is yet to be determined young hunter…right now he has much good on his side of the scale. But the scales can be tilted to either the side of right or wrong. I cannot promise you will see him again should he fail." Mike's voice was filled with regret.

"Then if Sam fails, I want you to grant me one wish—I want to end up where he does, even if it is the bowels of hell…" Dean stood and stared at the light.

"We shall see Dean—we shall see." Mike said as the voice and light faded leaving Dean alone and in the dark once more.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Sam almost dropped the phone thinking he was hearing things. "Dean?"

"Sammy—you have to help me—I don't have long—she'll find me…" Dean's voice sounded scared as he spoke into the phone.

"Where are you Dean?" Sam asked. A small blossom of hope filled the void that had existed in his heart for so long. He had never wanted to admit it; but as long as they had not been able to find Dean's body he'd had hope. The young hunter wasn't fooled, this was probably not his brother—but if his body still lived then maybe he could find a way to return his brother's soul.

There was a long pause and Sam heard the sound of someone in the background. "Hey sweetheart, ah could you tell me what the name of this town is?" Sam could almost see his brother's trademark grin as he heard the soft feminine voice answer in the background.

"New Hope, Minnesota—I'll meet you at Winston Park, by the pond—how soon before you can get here Sammy?" Dean sounded anxious.

Sam checked his watch before responding. "I can be there in about six hours—I'll meet you at 3:00 a.m. but first I gotta ask—how?"

"I don't know Sam—one minute I was puppy chow and the next, I was cohabitating with one of her demon friends. The last thing I remember is pain and darkness before I woke up in some old cabin. Maybe a hunter found my possessed self—I don't know Sam, but I need help now—don't know how long before she finds me…please Sammy…"

Sam made his decision even though something didn't sound right. He had to take the chance if it meant he could save his big brother. "I'll be there Dean, just stay hidden until then. Are you hurt? Do you need a doctor?"

"Not bad, my leg—doesn't work too well otherwise I would come to you. But I'm fine—I'll be better once you're here little brother—Damn I never thought I'd hear…" a soft sob sounded on the other end of the phone.

"I"ll be there Dean, you just hold on…" Sam hung up the phone and gazed at it for a brief moment before making his next call.

"Hey Bobby—you'll never guess who called…"

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Lilith smiled at the stupid waitress. She'd enjoyed this body in more ways than one the past six months, but now it was time to put an end to the game. She'd heard the hope in the young Winchester's voice. With a little preparation, she'd make sure Sam believed his brother was back—and then watch as the life left his eyes at his brother's hand.

She quickly paid the bill and exited the diner. The park was only a short distance and she had six hours to prepare. As she entered the park, she nodded to a man standing in the shadows. "It is done—the hunter is on his way. Your job will be to take care of whoever he brings with him."

The man nodded before moving back into the shadows. "I will do as you ask…"

The ancient demon looked around the park and decided to move to the bench near the water. The spot was nestled in the midst of a group of trees. It was a secluded spot with little chance of there being an interruption from the locals. Of course, if someone did happen by, they'd not be a problem anyway.

"Well as much as I liked this body, it's time to make myself more believable." The demon pulled a knife from her pocket and quickly stabbed it into the hunter's thigh. She groaned slightly from the pain but soon it passed. The body would show the strain, but she would be able to overcome it enough to finish the deed.

She watched as the blood continued to flow for a few moments before she pulled out a dirty rag she'd brought with. Without thought of the germs or infection, she tied it around the wound. Next she raised her hands and allowed the dirt and debris around her to pelt the skin of her meat suit. It wasn't long before anyone looking would see a badly wounded man who had been out in the elements for a while.

Hopefully it would fool young Samuel. She still felt a bubble of fear. However, ever since she'd lost her first battle; the number willing to follow her had shifted. Even without Sam, there were still others who had the strength and power to take the top position. Some even equaled her own—but she would deal with them later. First she had to get rid of the reluctant prince to the throne.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

"You know this is a trap Sam." Bobby said quietly as he sat in the passenger seat of the Impala. Sam had swung by and picked him up before heading into Minnesota.

"Don't you think I know that Bobby—but we never found his body. What if…" Sam looked for a moment at the seat beside him. His throat working as he wished for just a moment it was his brother sitting there instead of their old friend. "What if his body is still alive—I did some research and there are ways to reunite the soul with the living host—the early American Indians had rituals as did…"

Bobby sighed before he pulled out a book he'd brought with him. "Look Sam, I've been reading up on the same research, but they are all just myths. You realize you will probably be dealing with Lilith this time. She still wants you roasting over a fire on a spit. This is just like something she'd try. You can't just go in there blind."

"That's why I'm bringing you Bobby—you're my backup in case things go south. And I know it's probably a trap, but honestly what else can I do?" Sam looked out into the dark night. The small light of hope had slowly been dimming the closer he got to his destination. He wasn't a fool—there had been something off in Dean's voice. It sounded like him, but his brother would have found a way to meet him on friendlier ground.

"The park is isolated Bobby and from the map, it looks like the pond is in the middle of the small wooded area on the land. Nice and secluded—the perfect place for a trap. I know it's not Dean. The fact he didn't know where he was one minute but knew the name of the park…" Sam said as he pressed harder on the accelerator. He'd lost a little time picking up Bobby but knew he'd make it up once he hit the back roads.

"So how do you want to play this Sam?" Bobby asked quietly.

"I've already booked a small cabin located in a forest preserve not far from the park. We'll stop there long enough to make some preparations. Then I'll go in, you circle around and watch my back if you can. If she is trying to fool me, I'll play along and try to get Dean back to the Impala. You need to join us and play along—but Bobby?" Sam paused and looked at his old friend. "If it gets too bad, you save yourself you hear me—I don't want—I can't…"

A calloused hand gripped his arm for a moment. "I know kid—I know…but you gotta know I'm not goin' to let that bitch get her hands on another Winchester—it just ain't right." Bobby glared out into the night, his jaw clenched as both hunters remembered another night like this one when Dean was lost.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Bobby watched as Sam melted into the night. He circled around, keeping his eyes open for any other threat. If this was Lilith, he knew she never traveled alone. He understood Sam's reasons for taking the risk; he also had harbored hope that with the disappearance of Dean's body there might be a way to save the boy. However, he also knew Dean Winchester would kill him if he let something happen to his little brother while trying to save him.

The old hunter pulled out the demon blade and held it ready. He wished Sam had taken it with him, but the boy had a point. If Lilith was in Dean's body, Sam would not use the knife even if it meant protecting himself. So Bobby had agreed to take it with him. Of course, he would have no trouble—if it came between Sam and a possessed Dean, he would keep his promise to the oldest Winchester boy.

A movement to his right caught Bobby's eye. He crouched down behind a tree and watched for a moment, his hunter instincts alerted him to the danger. The man in front of him was searching the woods, probably for him. Keeping low to the ground, the hunter stalked his prey. He had to make sure before he killed—after all the man could be human.

As the moonlight broke through the trees for a brief moment, Bobby's fears were confirmed by the black eyes of the stranger. He'd have to try to take the man down and do an exorcism—but if he couldn't do it, then the knife would be used.

Bobby moved closer, placing his feet carefully as he silently approached the man. He reached forward quickly and hit the man on the back of the head with the knife handle. As the possessed gentleman fell, Bobby reached into his pocket and pulled out the plastic ties he always carried with him. It only took a moment for him to attach the ties to the man's arms and legs.

He sat back for a moment and looked around. So far so good—no one else was showing up to the party. He pulled out a handkerchief and gagged the man for good measure. It wouldn't do to have the man's screams give him away. He pulled out his own journal and quickly began to recite the exorcism.

The possessed man's eyes opened as the body began to twitch. Bobby continued to read the exorcism, while straddling the man's back to keep him down. For a brief moment the older hunter realized what it must feel like to ride a wild bronco as the body beneath him continued to lurch. But as he finished the exorcism, the man went completely lax as the dark smoke exited his body and disappeared into the night.

Bobby quickly checked and smiled when he found a faint pulse. Maybe this man would live. He removed the ties and turned the man into the recovery position to make sure he wouldn't choke if he became ill. Then he headed towards the place where Sam had gone.

As he came to the clearing he was amazed to see two figures staggering towards him. "Hey Bobby, give me a hand?" Sam called out, his hazel eyes flashed pure hatred for a brief moment before they softened and looked at the man he was helping.

Bobby moved forward and couldn't help the gasp that escaped his lips. "Oh my God—Dean!"

TBC

Raven524: Wow, this is really a long chapter. Sorry, but I just couldn't seem to find the right place to break it. I hope you all don't mind the slight exposition between Michael and Dean. I guess in my mind I pictured this conversation happening over a long period of time…Dean had a few months to ask questions…Anyway, I hope you don't find it too boring. More action to come in the next chapter!


	4. Chapter 4 To Kill a Demon

Disclaimer: I still don't own Supernatural or its characters

**Disclaimer:** I _still_ don't own Supernatural or its characters. I and am not making any money on this…I'm just having fun!

**Redemption of a Lost Soul**

**Chapter 4 – To Kill a Demon**

Sam moved quietly through the trees, his eyes searched the shadows for any surprise. But it was the figure lying on the bench not twenty feet away from him that finally drew him in. Even at this distance, he recognized the shape—he'd followed it for most of his life—most of it in the dark. Sam swallowed as he moved forward, almost afraid to blink. If he closed his eyes would Dean disappear?

It had been six months since he last saw his brother. Six months of being lost and alone while the world around him tried to kill him. And yet, it felt like yesterday to Sam Winchester. He had to stop himself from rushing forward—his heart screamed at him that it was his big brother but his mind knew the truth.

He hadn't understood how, but since Dean's death, he always seemed to know when a demon was present. It scared him as his 'spidey sense' as Dean called it had never been so specific before. His instincts told him this definitely was a demon. Still he had to play the part or the demon within would get suspicious.

"Dean?" Sam whispered. He moved to stand beside the silent figure, his hand reached down to touch the one person he thought he'd never see again. For a moment, he felt like this was another one of his dreams or nightmares. Any minute now he'd wake up in another hotel, his body aching from the latest hunt and the bed next to the door empty.

The form beneath his hand shivered and a soft moan escaped the man's lips as green eyes blinked open. "Sammy?"

"Dean is it really you?" Sam asked again as he helped his brother sit up on the bench. His eyes immediately saw the bloodied bandage wrapped around his older sibling's thigh. He also noticed the slightly rosy hue to pale cheeks and the beginning of heat from the fever to come.

"Sammy…" Dean whispered again, his eyes tearing up as he gazed at his little brother's face. Sam had to give the demon credit. It was doing a good job of convincing him. But not quite good enough; there was something missing from the depths of the green eyes looking up at him. The spark that had always told him it was Dean was missing. Now those eyes showed no life, only dullness and pain.

Sam wanted to grab his brother, to hug him and never let go. But this wasn't Dean. The pain of loss intensified as the hope he'd been harboring left nothing but an empty hole behind. His eyes narrowed slightly as he thought about the demon that was using his brother this way. If he couldn't save Dean, at least this time he'd make sure his brother's body would no longer be used.

"Sammy?" Dean's voice quivered as his brother reached for him. Sam backed up slightly but realized he had to get his raging emotions under control or the gig would be up. He reached for the mask that had fallen in place the day Dean died before he responded.

"Look at you Dean—you're a mess. We need to get you back to the hotel and clean you up." Sam leaned forward and allowed himself to believe for just a moment that it was his brother. He let his emotions free. His eyes filled with tears and longing as he gazed at the man in front of him. "God its good to see you bro'…"

"Ccoolddd Sam…" Dean said as another shudder went through his body. His eyes closed as if he wasn't able to keep himself awake any longer. The injured hunter's body listed forward as he fell into Sam's arms.

"No Dean! Stay with me—I won't lose you again!" Sam cried out without conscious thought as he caught his brother's limp form. He held him in his arms like he had six months ago. His mind traveled back to the room where his brother had given his life for him, the emotions broke free and crashed into him with the force of a freight train as he began to slowly rock back forth. A soft keening noise sounded on the wind as the wound he'd thought had healed, burst open with a vengeance.

"Dean…" Sam cried as he looked down at the still figure in his arms. It took a moment before he realized the chest was still moving and the body was warm to the touch—not cold. His shaking fingers searched and found the life within, faint but there; a testament to the living body in his arms.

He shook his head in wonder. Bobby had told him that Dean's body would probably be cold and lifeless. He'd warned Sam that Dean was now a reanimated toy for the demon's sick pleasure. The wounds Dean had sustained were too severe for his body to survive. Yet against all odds, here was his brother's body. It was slightly battered, but none the less whole and definitely alive. He didn't know how or why, but maybe he was being given another chance.

Now all he had to do was get rid of the demon, locate Dean's soul and put it back. A slightly hysterical giggle escaped the young hunter as he realized what that sounded like. One padded room, coming right up for Sammy Winchester. He should just use the exorcism they'd found and kill the bitch right now. It had to be Lilith; no other demon would have used his brother's body so effectively.

Unfortunately, if he wanted any chance at getting Dean back, he had to play his part. The young hunter steeled himself to do what he had to do in order to give Dean a second chance. Even if it meant he had to play brother to Satan himself. Sam gently tapped Dean's face and forced a smile as unfocused green eyes looked up at him. "Sammy?"

"Yes Dean, I think we already established that—how about you help your little brother get you out of here. Do you know where she is? Is the btch close by?" Sam watched as something flickered for a moment in his brother's eyes before the confused look returned. It had been quick but the hunter had caught it. Yep, it was definitely Lilith; the demon who had taken his life from him by stealing his brother's soul.

"Who?" Dean said as he struggled to get his feet under him. Sam placed his arm over his shoulder before they both began to move back towards the car. He had to concentrate to keep the tension from his body, to quell the hatred within that threatened to erupt.

"Lilith—remember? You said on the phone she was after you. Is she close by?" Sam asked again carefully keeping his tone light. Just saying the demon's name brought a bad taste to his mouth.

"Don't know Sammy—please it hurts…" Dean whimpered as his injured leg almost buckled under him. As the young hunter took on more of his brother's weight, he had further proof this wasn't _his _Dean. His brother would rather cut his leg off than admit it hurt him and he would have tried to walk out under his own steam, not lean and clutch at Sam as if he couldn't go on without him.

Sam looked up as he saw movement in the trees. His hand pulled out the gun he'd hidden in his pocket, his eyes alert for any danger. As the figure moved closer he sighed with relief. He'd wondered when their friend would make an appearance.

"Hey Bobby, can you help?" Sam called out. He saw the narrowed gaze on the older hunter's face before he too put on his game face. Their eyes met briefly in silent understanding before their old friend responded.

"Oh my God—Dean?" Bobby's voice shook.

"Bobby—good to see you again…" Dean spoke before his head fell forward onto his chest, his eyes closed.

Both hunters took the full weight of the unconscious man as they hurried towards the safety of the car. "Did you run into any trouble Bobby?" Sam asked as they gently placed Dean in the back seat and covered him with a blanket.

"There was a demon, but I took care of him. As soon as we're clear, I'll call in an anonymous tip so the guy'll be found. I think he'll be fine—just a little confused." Bobby smiled as he climbed into the front seat. Anytime they were able to save someone, it made the job seem less dark.

"Good Bobby—I'm glad." Sam returned the smile. Even though he now understood the need to kill first sometimes and ask questions later—he still felt each death as if it was somehow his fault. He'd just learned to hide it better and bury it faster.

"Hold on Dean, I'll have you at the motel in a few minutes." Sam called back to the huddled form in the back seat. As his eyes returned to the road, he never saw the feral smile that curled the pale lips or the opaque flash that showed in the normally green eyes.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Dean paced around the darkened room for what seemed like the zillionth time. He paused as he wondered exactly how you would count to a zillion. Was that even a number? He was sure his geeky brother would have the answer for him. A small smile curled on his lips as he let a memory of his brother flow through him.

It had been a long time since Mike had talked with him. But other than being extremely lonely, he hadn't been bothered by demons for a while now. Occasionally he'd hear what sounded like fighting outside his prison, but then silence would reign once more. He missed so many ordinary things. The warmth of the sun on his face, the smell of a greasy hamburger place, the jingle of loose change in a curvy waitress's pocket as she walked away to fill his order; the feel of a powerful engine beneath him as his favorite tunes played and of course he missed the low timber of his brother's voice.

The wounds to his body had healed. But with only his memories to keep him company, he began to wonder if he would be able to stay sane much longer. Memories and hope had kept him together so far—kept him from becoming what Ruby had warned him about. But each day, each hour he spent here seemed to make his memories dim and his hope right along with it.

He'd thought about what he'd learned regarding their destiny. While he still wasn't sure he bought the whole song and dance, there was too much for it to be chance. Besides, just like he didn't believe in destiny—Dean Winchester also didn't believe in chance. So his family had been screwed before Sam and he even existed. In a way, he hoped he'd get a chance to tell Sam.

He knew his little brother still blamed himself for the destruction of their family. He'd seen it in his brother's eyes the day he died—the apology that never had to be said. The look that told Dean no matter what he said, Sam would blame himself for not only his death, but all the deaths that happened before and would continue to happen. His little brother had taken on the weight of the world on his broad shoulders.

It was a world that from what he'd been told was on the brink of destruction with his little brother in the center, alone. "God, I'm so sorry Sammy—I didn't understand—didn't think it through like I should've…" Dean said softly as he sank to his knees and let the despair flow through him. He'd failed at the one task he'd been given; save Sam.

He'd always known being in Hell would be no picnic. He'd thought being tortured by the demons would be the worst. Then after he'd seen what he could become, that seemed to be the thing to fear the most. But in the end it was simply being alone with his own thoughts that threatened to break him.

He envisioned his little brother alone in a world where everything was after him. He saw him injured, lost and even dying. His imagination provided the details in vivid color. It was all his fault that his brother suffered without him at his side. Sam was right, he had been selfish. For the first time in a long time, he questioned his decision to bring Sam back the way he had. Maybe he should have let Sam go…

But the pain of that loss was as sharp as the day in Cold Oak when he held the limp form of his brother in his arms. The sense of failure, of loss took his breath away once more. What was he supposed to do? His only job was to save Sam.

"Yes, that is your job as the protector, as the warrior. But you are so much more Dean Winchester…" The room suddenly became brighter.

"Hey Mikey…long time no chat." Dean replied as he sat down and crossed his legs.

"Time is immaterial here. What is an eternity here is merely a blink of an eye among the living." Michael replied as he moved into the room. Dean gasped as the light grew brighter until it was painful to his eyes.

"Can you tone it down a bit…" Dean groaned as he covered his sensitive eyes.

The light dimmed slightly before the voice continued. "You should be proud of your brother Dean. He has seen through the evil one's guise and is poised to beat her at her own game. Soon your time here will end and you may return to the fight."

Dean stood and blinked. "But how?"

"I told you, as long as the vessel exists; the soul may be returned. With a little help of course…"

"How long have I been here—has he been…?" Dean asked quietly. He was afraid to ask how long he'd left his brother to fend for himself. A sliver of fear ran through him as he tried to figure out how much his brother had been affected, would he accept Dean or reject him?

"You've been here for a long time Dean and yet you have managed to keep your inner light burning throughout the darkness. Your trial is over. Six months has passed for your brother and you will find things have changed from when you left. Your return will not be easy for either of you…" Michael cautioned.

"I don't care. I need to be there for him. I can feel it…" Dean whispered, almost afraid to hope.

"You will hunter, but for you the means of your resurrection and all that has transpired behind the veil will remain a mystery to you and those around you. You will remember nothing of your time here, except for your dreams."

"So you mean I won't be able to tell Sam what happened, to let him know he'd not to blame…" Dean swallowed as the light flared.

I told you Dean, we cannot influence free will. Your brother must find his path on his own, but he can have help. That is why you are being given another chance. You also will still have your own trials while you live. Be wary of they easy way Dean. The darkness will threaten to extinguish that which you have protected so vigilantly." Michael warned.

Dean shook his head. "Always riddles with you guys. Why can't you just admit that even though I'll be back; Sam and I are still screwed?"

Laughter filled the darkened room as Dean felt himself falling to the floor. His eyes closed and for the first time in forever he fell into a deep and dreamless sleep.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Sam looked down at the sleeping form of his brother. He and Bobby had managed to get him to the cabin and placed on the bed they had prepared. There had been a moment when Dean had seemed to sense something was wrong, but Sam had managed to let his emotion through and convinced him he believed what the demon was selling.

The youngest Winchester smiled to himself as he felt something try to breach his defenses and read his mind. It was another of his gifts that he had kept from Bobby and everyone else. He had not intentionally sought to enhance his powers. But as they appeared, he had learned to recognize them.

His ability to sense demons in whatever form they took had come in useful more than once. It had kept him and his friends alive. It served him well even now as he sensed the demon before him that wore his brother's body.

The dreams of people dying had returned but he now used them to help find the demons who hid among them. He still didn't control them, but at least now he seemed to be able to use them to save a few innocent lives. The only 'power' he'd decided to concentrate on was his ability to shield his thoughts. He'd discovered that a number of demons were able to read and then use his mind against him. It had almost gotten him killed in the early days after Dean's demise.

He had contacted someone to help him work on sectioning his mind so that his inner most thoughts would be hidden. Of course, Missouri probably would have helped but he had decided to keep his 'freaky' powers to himself. He didn't need any more 'Gordons' coming after him. Also, he still felt uncomfortable being different. It was a constant reminder that he was tainted. He hadn't even told Bobby about the demon blood that flowed through his veins. It was another source of shame for him and added to the fear that he was not quite human.

His spoon bending powers sometimes showed up, but he still had no real control over it. The only other power he'd noticed was the ability to control lower level demons to some extent. Sometimes, if he concentrated he could hold them captive by force of will, just as Ava had done. But each time he tried to use that power he'd felt dirty afterwards.

This ability was a double edge sword for him. He knew he could control them and had used it to some extent to try to protect his brother. Those he sent back had been ordered to stop any other demon who might be after Dean. But he had stopped short of using the power to call a demon back from hell.

Oh he had thought about it. Especially on nights where the hunt hadn't gone as planned and he was alone and injured in some crappy hotel. It was then when he missed the soothing touch of his brother and the words that always made him feel safe. Then he was tempted to try to call his brother's soul from the pit, if only to talk to him once more.

But he had promised Dean he wouldn't use his powers to save him. Besides, calling his brother that way would only mean he'd have to send him back—and he just couldn't do that to him. No, there had to be another way and he was going to find it now that he had his brother's body back.

Bobby was looking into the ritual needed to locate Dean's soul. They'd already found a ritual to place the soul back into the body and had all the ingredients. Of course there was no guarantee it would work, but Sam had to hang onto his hope. He'd promised Dean he'd save him—and this time he would not fail.

Sam stood and moved over to the bed once more. He felt the fever rising in his brother and frowned. They couldn't let the body die, not again. That meant he had to get this fever under control. He gently touched the sleeping man's shoulder. "Dean, time to take your medicine."

"Wha? Sam?" Dean's raspy voice responded as green eyes slid open.

"Let me help you up. You need to take these antibiotics and the pain pills Bobby left for you." Sam replied as he helped Dean sit up on the bed. He watched as his brother swallowed the pills without complaint. It was further proof that this was not his big brother. Dean would never have allowed Sam to hover this way.

"Where's Bobby?" Dean croaked as he handed the water glass back to Sam. His eyes searched the room briefly before they returned to Sam's face.

"He's gone to get more supplies Dean. Don't worry, he should be back in an hour or so…" Sam stepped back and moved towards the bathroom to return the glass. He could almost hear the demon smile as he let slip he was alone. Everything was in place, now it was a waiting game to see who would spring the trap first.

"So what have you been up to Sam?" Dean asked as he settled back against the headboard.

Sam sat in the chair across the room and smiled softly. "The usual Dean—hunting demons and sending their asses back to hell where they belong. Just the family business as usual…"

Dean's eyes turned hard for a brief moment, but then returned to normal. "Shouldn't be long now." Sam thought to himself. Just a bit more goading and Lilith should show her hand. He saw Dean look at the door before he returned his gaze back to him.

"You know, I tire of this game Sam. Why don't we just get it over with…" Dean's eyes turned opaque and the room began to shake. Sam watched as his brother seemed to rise from the bed, his weakness apparently gone. But as he neared the edge of the rug, he stopped.

"Do you honestly think a devils trap will hold me?" Lilith held out her hands and the room shook harder. Sam knew it was only a matter of time before the seal would be broken.

"No, but then I didn't expect it to Lilith." Sam said calmly as he rose to stand near the center of the room. He could feel the energy in the room but it didn't scare him. He knew whatever her powers were; he had been able to escape them before.

Lilith's eyes narrowed as she glared at Sam. "You have so much power and yet you hide behind your humanity." She said with loathing.

"I'll take my humanity over your power any time you bitch. You may have taken my brother's soul, but you won't get another Winchester without a fight." Sam said softly. His eyes hardened with the hatred he felt towards the demon in front of him. It took all his control not to tip his hand. He needed to know if his brother was still whole or if he'd been turned into a soulless demon. He had to find out if there was still a chance to save his brother like he promised.

"Your brother is lost to you. He suffers at the hands of my followers—can you hear his screams Sammy?" Lilith moved her hands and Sam fell to his knees as his brother's voice echoed in his mind.

"_Sammy, please save me! Oh God Sam!"_ The pain in his brother's voice was almost more than he could stand. He blinked for a moment before he pushed back with his mind against the unwanted memories.

As he was fighting the mental assault he felt himself flying into the wall behind him. He blinked as pain from the impact raced through his body. The pressure increased until he soon found himself fighting for breath. Just like the night Dean had died, he felt her power and for a brief moment he felt fear. But as the vision of Dean's bloody body flashed before his eyes, his anger and hatred grew.

"You can defeat me Sam, but only if you use what you were given. I am betting you don't have the guts to do it and that is what will allow me to kill you now." Lilith sneered as she moved to the edge of the devil's trap. With a glance she broke the seal and moved to within arms reach of Sam.

"Well—you'd—lose—that—bet—bitch!" Sam stuttered as he closed his eyes and reached for what he'd kept secret since Dean's death. He felt the power grow inside him as he let his hatred feed it. He'd discovered the secret and even though it scared him, for once he was going to use it. Just this once…

"_Sam, no—remember what I taught you…"_ Dean's voice echoed in his mind. He gulped and opened his eyes as sweat poured down his haggard features. As quickly as the power had surged, he felt it leave him. He couldn't do it, it felt wrong. If she wanted him to unleash his full power, then he knew it was something he couldn't do.

The yellow eyed demon had tried to get him to let the power consume him as it had done with the others. But he'd seen the price to be paid. They were no longer human after the change. And worse, they were able to be controlled by Azazel some how. No, he wouldn't allow his powers to overtake him, but he could still fight.

Sam began to speak the exorcism he and Bobby had found. It was said that it could destroy the demon. Whether that meant it just couldn't come back from hell or would be completely destroyed they had no clue. But Sam had to try. As the words flowed from his lips, pain flowed through his body.

The demon was using her power on him once again. A smile on her lips as she forced the air from his lungs. "The last time we met you were lucky. I don't know how you managed to evade my power but this time I will win. How poetic that you will die at the hands of your brother."

Sam watched as a knife appeared in the demon's hands. He couldn't get enough air into his lungs to continue the ritual but he continued to struggle. He had to win, he couldn't let the btch continue to use his brother this way. "Let—him—go…" Sam managed to rasp out.

The demon stopped for a moment and smiled. "What and give up a perfectly good meat suit? I have to say ripping the soul from this body was good, but then using it over the past six months to do my bidding—has been even more fun. Do you know how many have died at these hands?" The demon reached out and touched Sam.

Sam shuddered as his brother's hand clasped his shoulder for a moment. This hand didn't bring comfort, it only brought death. He closed his eyes as he remembered how he'd felt after being possessed by Meg. His own hands had been forced to kill and yet Dean had told him it wasn't his fault. How would his big brother feel now?

He watched as the demon pulled the knife back, ready to strike. As the pressure on his body increased, he groaned. "Sorry Dean, I tried…" Sam whispered as blackness began to descend. A loud cry from the door brought him back.

"Stay away from him you bitch!" Bobby yelled as he charged the demon with the demon killing blade in front of him. His aim was true as it struck the demon in the shoulder. The blade had temporarily incapacitated the demon, but unless they killed the host body with the blade, the demon could still return.

Sam blinked as he tried to focus. He couldn't let Bobby do it. He couldn't lose Dean again, not when they were so close. "Bobby NO!" Sam cried as he tried to grab for the knife.

"Sam--boy, snap out of it and do the ritual!" Bobby yelled as he pulled Dean's body further from Sam's reach. He kept the knife poised at the older sibling's throat. His intention was clear. If they couldn't drive the demon from Dean's body—he would kill the demon and Dean along with it.

Sam pushed himself up from the floor and staggered over towards the center of the room. He could see the determination in the older hunter's eyes and knew he had only one shot to do this right. He closed his eyes and began the ritual he and Bobby had found to expel and kill the older demons. As the Latin rolled from his tongue, he couldn't help but worry what would happen to his brother's body once the demon was gone.

"Keep going Sammy—it's workin'" Bobby encouraged as Dean's body writhed beneath the aged hunter's grasp.

The young hunter continued the ritual until the opaque eyes glared at him one last time. "You may send me back, but I will make sure you're brother suffers Samuel Winchester. You may defeat me, but others will come and eventually you will either become one of us or die. Just remember—I'll be waiting…….ARGH!" The dark smoke rose from Dean's mouth and disappeared with a bright flash of light against the ceiling of the cabin.

Sam fell to the ground next to his brother. His fingers reached to his brother's neck and cringed when he felt the beating of his brother's heart stutter and then stop. "Oh God Bobby—we lost him again…"

TBC

Raven524: Yes, I know no Dean just yet. But I promise he will be back—at least I think he will. Thanks to all of you who have responded on this story. I really appreciate the feedback. I hope you continue to enjoy the story as it develops…


	5. Chapter 5 The Long Way Home

Disclaimer: I still don't own Supernatural or its characters

**Disclaimer:** I _still_ don't own Supernatural or its characters. I and am not making any money on this…I'm just having fun!

**Redemption of a Lost Soul**

**Chapter 5 – The Long Way Home**

_Sam fell to the ground next to his brother. His fingers reached to his brother's neck and cringed when he felt the beating of his brother's heart stutter and then stop. "Oh God Bobby—we lost him again…"_

Sam held Dean's body in his arms; a soft keening noise once more filled the room as his final hope died. "What have I done Bobby—you heard what she said. What if the ritual didn't kill her? Oh God, I've made things worse!"

Bobby stood and placed a hand on the young Winchester's shoulder. "There was a chance Sam and we had to take it. It was only a slim chance at best…"

"What do I do now Bobby?" Sam asked as he clutched his brother to him.

"We do what we were going to do six months ago. We prepare the body and burn it. It was what your brother wanted Sam…" Bobby stood and waited.

Sam looked down at his brother's body and couldn't do it. Something in him cried out for him to wait. He now knew how his big brother had felt and God help him if the cross road demon was here right now—he'd be heading there. But that way was closed to him by his own hand. There had to be something he could do—he couldn't fail, not with this.

"NO! I can't Bobby—not yet…" Sam whispered as he dropped his head down and let the tears he'd held at bay for six months fall onto the cold form of his brother.

Bobby rose and left the room with a soft sigh. But Sam didn't care. He needed more time. He rose and gently placed Dean back on the bed. He went into the next room and came back with the medical kit. He soon had removed his brother's shirt and checked the wound from the knife. It was deep, but he knew Bobby had been careful. Had Dean lived, it would have been painful but not life threatening.

"Don't worry Dean, it's just a scratch." Sam murmured as he gently cleaned the wound. No blood welled up, but that didn't stop him from pulling out the needle and thread. His mind went back to the many times they had sewn each other up. As he set to work on his task, he felt a measure of peace in the familiar routine. At least for now he could pretend for a little while that his brother was still with him.

For a moment his mind slipped back to the feeling of power he'd experienced. If Lilith feared it then maybe it was enough to give him what he wanted. After all he'd done to help others, why couldn't he just have this one thing. _"Because it's not right Sam, what's dead should stay dead." _ Dean's voice filled his mind.

As he finished fixing his brother's shoulder he wiped at the tears that had fallen on his brother's face. "Yeah, I know. No chick flick moments right? You never wanted me to tell you how much you meant to me Dean and I hope—I hope you knew when—well the first time you—ah—left. But now I need to tell you, so just suck it up and listen…" Sam waited for Dean's patented groan followed by the sigh that usually meant he was ready.

When it didn't come, another sob broke free. "I know this is probably dumb. I mean, you're gone—been gone now for six months--I get that. But I just can't let you go Dean. You were always there for me, growing up and even when I was away at college—I knew you were only a phone call away." Sam's breath hitched as he thought about the waste. The precious time he'd lost with both his brother and father over a senseless dream.

"You got me through Jess and so many other things. But most of all Dean, you had faith in me even when I didn't. I don't know if you were right or not—I'm still not sure I can avoid the path the demon set me on. There are things I should have told you, about Mom, about me." Sam shuddered at the memory the demon had given him of his mother's final moments. He had been tainted by demon blood and their mother knew what was happening.

Sam shook his head, he'd had months to ponder over that question and it never brought him any peace. He placed his hand on Dean's hair as he continued. "But I just want you to know—to know—OH God Dean…" Sam sat back in the chair as his head fell to his hands. The dam holding in his emotions broke as sobs wracked his body. He felt himself fall apart and this time he wasn't sure he could find enough pieces to put himself back together again. After a few more minutes he managed to gather what was left of Sam Winchester and rose to his feet. He'd failed his brother and broke his promise. "I'm so sorry Dean. But I can't—I mean I tried—but I can't save…"

"What's a guy got to do to get some sleep around here?" Dean's voice whispered from the bed.

Sam fell back against the chair; his momentum caused the chair to topple with him in it. He groaned as his head hit the wall with a resounding thump before he came to rest on the floor. The young hunter blinked before he called out to the one person he never thought he'd hear from again. "Dean?"

"Who else—GAH—I sure hope I had a good time last night to get this bad of a hang over…" Dean said as green eyes opened and wearily looked at his younger brother.

"BOBBY!" Sam yelled as he stood and backed away from Dean. It couldn't be his brother and yet, he didn't sense the demon's presence any longer. The sound of heavy footsteps followed by a gasp announced the older hunter's entrance into the room.

"Dean?" Bobby managed to get out before he pulled the demon killing knife from behind his back.

"Of course—who else would it be?" Dean seemed genuinely puzzled about their behavior. He groaned as he tried to sit up, his hand reached for his shoulder.

"But how?" Sam asked, still standing back as if he expected Dean to jump up and attack him again. There was no way this could be his brother. He'd been dead not two minutes ago and without the demon…what the hell inhabited his brother's body now?

"Christo!" Bobby automatically stated as he pulled out his flask of holy water. When neither produced a reaction other than for a slight quirk of Dean's eyebrow the older hunter shook his head.

"I don't know Sam. I just don't know…" Bobby sat down on the other bed in the room but kept the knife within easy reach.

"Is someone going to tell me what's going on?" Dean demanded as he gazed at the two stunned men in the room.

Sam pulled the chair back up and sat down heavily in it before he responded. "What is the last thing you remember Dean?"

Dean's brow creased as he tried to recall. "I remember heading for New Harmony to find the bitch that held my contract…." Dean paused as his mind went back. Sweat broke out on his face and he began to tremble slightly. "Ruby was possessed by Lilith and called her hounds—Oh God!" Dean's distress was clear as the memory of his death crashed down on him. The pain and terror of the moment filled his eyes as he searched for his brother. "She was going to kill you Sam and I couldn't do anything to stop it!"

Sam moved to the bed and pulled Dean into his arms. He could feel his brother's panicked breathing as memories washed over him. "Shhh Dean, it's over now." Sam looked over Dean's head at Bobby, the worry and questions reflected in the older hunter's gaze.

After a few moments, Dean took a stuttered breath before he pushed back against Sam's embrace. "Dude, personal space!"

Sam laughed as he pulled back slightly to look closer. He wanted to believe so badly and yet, was this truly _his_ Dean? Or was it demonic in nature—something else to torment him? Beneath the confusion and pain in his big brother's eyes, he saw a spark of something he had been missing for six months. Could it be that his brother had beaten the odds once more?

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Dean woke to the hushed voices in the other room. He stretched and winced at the pain in his shoulder and leg. As events from the previous night came back to him, he looked down to examine his injuries more closely. He shivered slightly even though he still felt the fever that had come back during the night. The hunter could see fine scars on his chest from where the hell hounds had attacked him. The tattoo was gone, probably torn from him by the massive jaws.

It seemed like yesterday to him and yet the wounds had healed completely. Except for the wound on his shoulder and leg; these were caused by a knife, not claws or teeth.

He remembered the pain as he rubbed his chest and the feeling of loss. But then there was nothing until he woke up with Bobby ready to skewer him with a demon blade. He wasn't stupid. Something had happened but so far neither Sam nor Bobby was willing to fill him in on it. Suddenly he no longer wanted to be alone. He didn't understand why, but the quietness of the room was unsettling to him. He pushed himself up further on the bed and swung his legs over the side. He was through laying here waiting for those two to decide what to tell him. He needed answers and he was going to get them.

"It's been six months Bobby, how could he not remember?" Sam said softly in the next room. Dean leaned against the door jam as his mind tried to absorb the time. He'd lost six months according to Sam. It didn't make sense to him. He was supposed to be in hell and yet here he was holding up the door jam as he tried to keep the room in focus.

"I don't know Sammy. He was dead and he must have gone to hell, unless his soul never left when the bitch possessed his body. But the tattoo on his chest would have stopped that kind of possession…" The older hunter paused for a moment before he continued. "or he's like Ruby…" Bobby replied as he went to the refrigerator to grab another beer for himself and Sam. As the older hunter handed the beer to Sam he paused with a thoughtful look on his face. "You didn't do anything…right Sam. I mean, no deals—you'd tell me right boy?"

Sam sat back his eyes quickly cast downward before he replied. "No Bobby, I didn't make a deal to get him back." Sam looked up at their old friend; his eyes begged the man to agree with him. "He can't be like Ruby. The holy water didn't have any affect on him even when I put some in his orange juice last night. So it has to be Dean right?"

"Sammy, if you did something you need to tell me. It could have repercussions son…remember nothin' good comes from using black magic." Bobby pushed but Sam refused to answer. Dean stood back as he processed the information. From his brother's posture, he could tell Sam was hiding something from the older hunter. But the question was what and did it have something to do with bringing him back.

Dean pushed himself away from the door and slowly entered the room. "Yeah Sammy—I'd like an answer to that question myself. What did you do?"

Sam jumped as his eyes rose to meet Dean's. For a brief moment he saw fear in them before they were replaced with concern. "Dean, you shouldn't be out of bed!"

"Never mind that Sam—from the sounds of things I have six months to catch up on beginning with how the hell did you bring me back?" Dean limped to the empty chair at the table and gingerly sat down. He smiled as Bobby handed him a cold beer. As he tipped the bottle to his lips, he paused. A memory, faint but there surfaced of searing pain when he ate or drank. He put the bottle down and sighed.

"You must be hungry Dean—think I'll go grab some take out food…" Bobby said as he rose from the table. Dean wasn't sure he'd be able to keep it down, but he simply nodded as he continued to study his little brother.

"Sounds good Bobby…don't forget the pie huh?" He grinned as the old hunter left the cabin. As the word left his mouth, he shuddered at the memory of the last time he'd asked for pie. "Strike that Bobby, no pie this time okay?"

Bobby nodded his eyes filled with sympathy as he grabbed the keys and left the room. A moment later the sound of Bobby's truck filled the sudden void in the room. Dean shifted and groaned lightly as he turned back to look at his little brother.

He saw some new scars that hadn't been there before and he could have sworn his brother had grown another inch or two. But it was his brother's eyes that had changed the most. There was no longer a hint of vulnerability in them as they stared back at him. For a moment, Dean felt like he was looking into his father's eyes.

"Ok Sammy, it's just you and me. Please tell me you didn't let Ruby talk you into using one of your powers to bring me back…" Dean watched as Sam's back stiffened.

"I said I didn't and I meant it. I don't know what happened Dean. I mean one moment you were possessed by Lilith and the next your lying stone cold dead" Sam's breath hitched for just a moment, but then the mask fell back in place. "Hell to be honest, I'm not even sure you are a hundred percent—you…" Sam looked down at the table for a moment before he stood and headed for the bedroom. "It's time for your medication. I'll just get it so you can take it after you eat."

Dean watched his little brother leave the room without making any further eye contact. He was sure that Sam was hiding something, but he also knew until his brother was ready to talk he wouldn't be getting anything else from him. He ran a shaky hand through his hair as he tried to figure out if what Sam had said was true. Was he a hundred percent Dean Winchester or something else?

The Yellow eyed demon had once asked him the same question about Sam and he'd spent months trying to figure out if what had come back was really his brother. He still wasn't sure all of his little brother had returned as Sam had changed so much since then. Even now his little brother seemed to be more closed off than ever. Had he also been affected? He felt the same, except for the missing time which bothered him. There was also a gnawing fear in his stomach whenever he was left alone which he couldn't understand. Even now, it took everything he had not to follow Sam into the bedroom.

It was obvious he had changed, but not in the way Sam and Bobby thought. Some of his confidence was missing. For the first time since he could remember he felt real fear and he didn't know what to do about it. He jumped when he felt a large hand on his shoulder.

"You ok Dean?" Sam asked softly before he backed away. It was almost like his brother was afraid of him.

Dean wanted to give the usual Winchester answer, but for some reason he felt the need to be honest with his little brother. "I don't know Sam. I just don't know…" He let his head drop down to his arms as he suddenly felt exhausted.

"Come on big brother. You're pushing yourself too hard too soon. You need to rest and let the fever run its course. Now take the pills and I'll get you back to bed." Sam said softly as he placed a cold glass of orange juice in front of Dean.

Dean's eyebrow quirked for a moment before he reached over and took the pills. He gingerly sipped the juice, smiling when the phantom pain didn't appear. "Satisified Sam? No twitches, no pain, no pea soup or head spinning 360 degrees—for what it's worth. I'm not a demon. That much I'm sure of."

Sam smiled for a moment as echoes of his brother's sarcasm filled the room. He wanted so badly to believe and yet, until he was sure he had to be careful. There were too many bad things after him these days for him to let his guard down easily. "Okay Dean, I believe you. But humor me, we need to take this slow to make sure you're not hurt someplace else. I don't think I can take…" Sam blinked for a moment as the slight wobble in his voice gave him away. "I can't lose you again Dean—so please, for me. Let's just take this slow…"

Dean reached a hand over to clasp his brother on the back of the head. He felt his brother tense under his touch but a moment later he relaxed. "It's okay Sam. Believe me; I'm not in any rush to get back in the saddle just yet. Now get out of my way. I think I'll take a nap until Bobby gets back with the food."

Dean stood and would have fallen if Sam hadn't grabbed his arm. For a moment he wanted to push away, but the feeling of his brother's touch meant more to him than his pride. For once he was willing to let Sam lead him as they headed for the bed in the next room.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Bobby stood in the old shed. He'd come back with the food only to find the two boys sleeping. It was a sight he never thought to see again, but as much as he wanted to believe in miracles he just couldn't accept Dean's appearance without question.

He had studied the oldest Winchester boy and noticed the haunted look in his eyes when he thought no one was looking. It was obvious Dean was human and yet it didn't make sense. According to everything he'd read, a ceremony had to be held to reconnect the lost soul with the living body. They hadn't even located Dean's soul before his body died. He needed answers for himself and for the youngest Winchester.

He'd watched Sam over the past six months and seen the changes his brother's death brought out. Sam didn't trust and rarely told people his thoughts anymore. He'd become more like his father in that respect. He'd become methodical in his hunting, always doing the research before he took the first step. But when it came time to the hunt itself, Sam Winchester had shown he was a force to be reckoned with.

Bobby smiled softly as he remembered hearing another hunter talk in awe about the youngest Winchester's exploits. There were now only a few in the hunting community who still wondered about John's youngest son's allegiance. It was clear Sam was out to get rid of as many 'evil sons of a bitches' as he could.

The fact that he always hunted solo was a source of great concern to the older hunter. He'd promised Dean he'd look after the young pup. But other than regular check ins and a few times when he'd been too injured to care for himself; the youngest Winchester stayed alone. The talkative youngster who used to constantly be under his feet had grown into a quiet and lonely man. But maybe now, if this truly was Dean—Sam might recapture some of what had made him Dean's little brother.

As he finished the calling ritual he turned and waited. He wasn't disappointed when the demon he'd called appeared. "Bobby—I thought for sure it would be Sam calling me. But then you boys just can't seem to remember to use the phone can you?" Ruby's voice filled the small shed.

"I don't have time for your wise cracks. I need to know—what did you show Sam?" Bobby asked point blank.

Ruby smiled softly as she walked a few steps and stopped. A frown formed on her face as she realized she'd now stood in a devil's trap. "You called me Bobby. I see we really need to work on your trust issues. But in answer to your question—I didn't show Sam anything…"

"Then how do you explain Dean's return?" Bobby asked.

"What do I look like? The Encyclopedia of Supernatural Events? Seriously Bobby, I don't know how it happened. Maybe Sam finally got some backbone and used some of his powers to call him back or maybe he was delivered by a rather large stork. I'm not in the business of providing you with the answers to all that is Winchester." Ruby scowled as she scuffed her boot into the dirt in front of the trap.

"I wish I could believe you girl. If I find out you had anything to do with this…" Bobby started but stopped at the girl's bitter laugh.

"I know, you'll send me back to hell. I heard that same song and dance from Sam six months ago. Look all I'll tell you is this. You may think that by killing Lilith you are out of the woods, but there are more out there just waiting to get Sammy's entrails on a hook. You need to get him to realize he has to learn how to use his powers if he wants to survive—hell if any of you want to survive." Ruby glowered at Bobby.

"Not going to happen Ruby. Not with Dean back in the game. Sam will not be needing any of your demonic teachings to fight. Now get before I change my mind and send you back just for the fun of it…" Bobby reached with his foot and broke the line on the Devil's trap.

"Mark my words Bobby. Sam will live to regret his decision to suppress his powers. If he won't use them, someone else will. As for me, don't be surprised if you find me backing the winning horse next time…." Before Bobby could respond the demon disappeared.

"That went well!" Bobby muttered as he walked back towards the cabin. The only useful thing he learned was that Lilith had obviously been killed by the ritual they had found. It was one more thing in their arsenal that they could use to send the demon spawn packing. But Sam was still a beacon to the evil in the world. He just hoped with Dean back, his little brother would be able to stay the course.

TBC

Raven524: Thanks to everyone who has responded. I really appreciate knowing how you feel, what you like and yes, even what you don't like. So take a moment and drop me line—I promise I don't bite—much! LOL


	6. Chapter 6 Hunting Alone

Disclaimer: I still don't own Supernatural or its characters

**Disclaimer:** I _still_ don't own Supernatural or its characters. I and am not making any money on this…I'm just having fun!

**Redemption of a Lost Soul**

**Chapter 6 – Hunting Alone**

Dean started awake his mind instantly cataloging two things. First, he really needed a shower and second, his little brother was missing. It had been a long ten days for him. Sam seemed to always be hovering near by as if he was afraid Dean would disappear. But he'd allowed it because he understood how Sam felt. It had been months after Cold Oaks before he could breath normally when Sam wasn't around.

He sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He was pleased that other than a slight pull on the healing skin, his injuries no longer were painful. If it weren't for the nightmares that plagued his sleep, he would say he was back to normal. He shook slightly for a moment as remnants of last nights dream flashed through his mind. The hell hounds had him and were tearing him apart. He fingered the wounds on his chest as he felt the teeth tear into him. Taking a deep breath, Dean willed his mind away from the image and back to the problem at hand. Sam was missing and he had to find out where he went. But first he needed a shower and a cup of coffee.

"Hey Dean, you hungry for breakfast?" Bobby said as he popped his head into the bedroom.

"You bet Bobby. Where's Sam?" Dean asked as he grabbed his shaving kit. He smiled as he saw his duffle bag at the end of his bed. Some time during the last ten days his little brother had gotten his things and brought them inside.

"He's checking out a hunt, should be back later tonight." Bobby replied as if it was the most natural thing for Sam to be gone. Dean stopped and looked at the old hunter.

"He what?" Dean demanded as his shower was forgotten. He followed their old friend out to the tiny kitchen. He accepted the cup of coffee but wouldn't back down from his question.

"Look Dean, your brother got a tip this morning about some unusual deaths a few towns over. From the sounds of it, he thinks it might be some kind of black dog. As soon as he has it sorted, he'll return." Bobby shrugged as he turned to the stove. The old hunter didn't see the slight shudder that ran through Dean's frame at the mention of the dogs.

Dean pulled the hunter around, his knuckles white as he faced the knowing look on the man's face. "You let him go alone? What if it's not a black dog? Who's gonna look out for him?"

Bobby sighed and pointed to the chair as he poured his own cup of coffee. "Son, a lot has happened in the last six months. Your brother always hunts alone. He refused to let anyone else help him. I considered myself lucky that he checked in with me regularly and came to me when he was hurt too badly to fix himself up."

Dean swallowed as his protective instincts kicked into high gear. Sam had been injured and he hadn't been there to take care of him. Evidently Bobby had done a good job of taking care of his brother while he had been vacationing downstairs. But he was here now and it was time he got back to work. "Why didn't he wait for me?"

The agitated hunter saw the sympathy in the older man's eyes as he tried to explain. "Dean, I'm not sure but I think he's still having trouble accepting that you're back. I mean, he's had to be alone for six months—doing the research, completing the hunt and even taking care of himself. He sort of became a real loner, just like your Dad. He's not used to getting permission anymore son. Your little brother grew up."

Dean's hands shook slightly as he took a sip of the coffee. Of course Sam had learned to stand on his own two feet. He told him to continue to fight when he—well before the hell hounds showed up. So why did he feel so—so—useless? He had begun to think that maybe he had been sent back to save Sam. But what if his little brother no longer needed saving? Why was he here then? A shudder went through him as dark thoughts started to surface.

A gentle hand on his shoulder caused him to look up. "Don't worry Dean. I'm sure things will get back to normal. He's just not used to having someone look out for him anymore. It will take time for him—and you to adjust. Now pancakes or eggs?" Bobby stood and walked back towards the stove.

"Both?" Dean responded with a slight grin. Bobby was right; it would just take some time for him to get his legs back under him. Then he'd have a little talk with his brother about hunting alone. Until then, he figured he could catch up on what his little brother had been up to for the past six months. It was clear Sam had taken his last orders seriously from what he'd overheard so far.

"So Bobby, what has that little geek been up to?" Dean settled back as Bobby began to fill him in. As he listened, he felt proud of what Sam had accomplished. He always knew his brother was strong and the last six months had proved it. But along with the feelings of pride came a sick feeling in his stomach. It was also clear Sam didn't need him. The only problem was where did that leave him?

He'd spent his whole life taking care of the kid. If he didn't need to take care of Sam, what was he supposed to do? "Are you gonna eat the food or play with it?" Bobby said calmly as Dean jumped.

"Sorry Bobby—was just thinking I guess. I'm going to go take a shower. Let me know if you hear anything from Sam will yah?" Dean stood and emptied his nearly full plate into the garbage. Suddenly his appetite seemed to have deserted him.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Sam sipped on the cup of coffee as he sat in the Impala. The witnesses had said the dog like creature appeared around midnight in front of the cemetery. From the description, he was pretty sure he was dealing with a black dog. He'd thought about asking Dean if he wanted to come with, but then figured it might be too close to the hell hounds that had attacked Dean. Besides, his brother still wasn't totally healed. He'd seen him trying to hide his limp yesterday and the way he held his shoulder stiffly. No, Dean wasn't ready to hunt yet and Sam was fine with letting him get the rest he deserved.

He'd listened to Dean as he fought the battle in his dreams each night. Last night had been the worst. Dean had woken him up with a scream, his eyes wild as he jumped from his bed. Sam saw his brother look down at his chest, his fingers checked for wounds that were long healed. It had taken almost an hour before Dean had calmed down enough to go back to sleep. How could he ask his big brother to help him with something like this after he'd had that kind of nightmare?

As he watched the night for the beast, his mind couldn't help going over the way his brother had reappeared. The truth was he wasn't sure himself if his powers hadn't in some way been involved. He hadn't intentionally done anything, but what if was like the first time Lilith tried to kill him? He'd been thinking about using his powers just before and then suddenly Dean woke up.

After all, he had been tempted more than once to try. He'd missed his brother more than he wanted to admit. But he had learned his lesson from the Trickster. If his powers had brought Dean back, what would the repercussions be? Bobby was right, nothing good ever came from using what he called dark magic. The way his abilities appeared without conscious thought scared him more than anything else. What if he had the wrong 'thought' and ended up killing someone?

That is why he never mentioned his psychic episodes to anyone. If one of his freaky powers happened to erupt, he would just ignore it and move on. He never encouraged it, but deep down he know they were a part of him now just like the demon blood that flowed through his veins. He could no longer convince himself he was normal. He could only hope that he wouldn't turn into some kind of monster like Gordon had said.

Movement from inside the cemetery caught his eye. "Ok doggie, let's get this over with so I can get back to big brother. He's probably chewing Bobby's leg off right now waiting for me to return!"

Sam placed the shotgun with consecrated iron under his arm. The machete was hung on his belt as he grabbed the bag of supplies he always kept filled and ready in the trunk. His eyes fell on the leather jacket, folded neatly in the corner of the organized compartment. When he had placed all of Dean's things in storage, he'd kept this with him. It was his way of keeping Dean close. His hand reached for the soft leather but stopped as he heard a menacing growl come from behind him.

The hunter slammed the trunk and turned to face the red eyes of not one, but two demonic dogs. "Great, you'd think the witnesses could count!" Sam muttered as he cocked the gun and took aim at the closest animal. As he fired, he dodged to the left. He felt a dark body sail past him but not before a sharp claw ripped through his jacket and into his arm.

"GAH!" Sam cried as he felt fire run up his arm. He still managed to pull the machete out as he headed towards the first dog. The way to be sure a black dog was dead was to decapitate it. As he raised the machete he heard a growl behind him. Turning he raised the sharp instrument and swung as the second dog once again pounced. A howl sounded through the night as Sam managed to deflect the dog by cutting into its side. He turned and faced his adversary once more as the dog prepared to charge.

Blood dripped from Sam's fingers down onto the ground from his now useless left arm. The gun lay at his feet but the hunter knew he'd never get to it in time. The only way to end this was for him to use the machete and decapitate the beast. The only problem was he needed two good arms to do it. For the first time in a long time Sam wished his brother was standing beside him. As the animal continued to circle him, he wondered what Dean would say if he didn't make it back from this hunt.

Sam saw the muscles gather in the dog's body as it prepared to launch at him. He pulled the machete up in front of him and grit his teeth against the pain. The handle was slick with his blood but he refused to give in. He had to get back to Dean. As the dog jumped Sam stood his ground. His eyes grew large for a moment as the dog seemed to hang in mid air in front of him. Pain erupted in his head and he could feel the slow drip of blood from his nose as he faced the enraged animal but he shoved it to the back of his mind.

The hunter blinked for just a moment before he raised the blade and separated the beast's head from its body. As the large head rolled against his foot he swayed and fell to one knee. The sharp pain increased and pierced his head making him feel sick. It was like the headaches he'd get before a vision.

"Not now—please!" Sam closed his eyes and waited for the vision to appear. But none came. The pounding in his head increased for a moment before it finally became a dull throb. He rubbed at the liquid he felt drip on his upper lip and wasn't surprised to find blood. Great another one of his freaky powers had decided to show up.

Sam rose on unsteady feet; the machete rose and fell one more time as he took care of the other black dog. Opening the bag he left beside the trunk, he pulled out the salt and lighter fluid. A short time later all that remained of the two black dogs was a pile of ash.

The exhausted hunter climbed back into the Impala and pointed it back towards the cabin and Dean.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Dean had spent the day sitting outside the cabin. Bobby had appeared periodically with food or another bottle of beer. But the older hunter seemed to sense Dean's need to be alone. It surprised him really since he hated being alone ever since he'd woken up. He didn't remember much from his time in hell, but what little he did remember it wasn't pleasant.

His hand reached up to touch his shoulder as phantom pain radiated from there. He remembered hooks and chains along with indescribable pain. But most of all he remembered the loneliness. The part that bothered him the most was he didn't remember how he'd gotten out. Did the demon let him loose? If so, for what purpose? If Sam was involved what did that mean? There were too many questions and no answers for his miraculous return from the dead.

Bobby seemed to think that the death of the demon had allowed his soul to return. But Dean couldn't help but think there was more to it than that. Both Sam and Bobby had told him they hadn't used any black magic or summoning spells to bring him back. He'd searched his memories and even drank some holy water when the others weren't looking just to be sure he hadn't come back like Ruby. As far as he could tell, he'd come back human. No freaky powers, no demonic urges just a boat load of feelings he couldn't put memories to.

Which brought him back to his fear of being left alone. If Sam no longer needed him would he still stay with Dean? His brother had proven he could get along without him before and in fact he'd done more than good while he was at Stanford. He'd managed to get a free ride and met the girl of his dreams. Now according to Bobby, his little brother had become the hunter their father had always wanted.

Gone was the little brother who saw killing as only the final choice. According to Bobby he'd learned to shoot and kill, accepting collateral damage as part of the war they fought. He saw the sadness in the old hunter's eyes as he described the change that had come over Sam. A change that had started even before Cold Oaks, but seemed to be cemented by those turn of events; Sam had become a hunter to be reckoned with.

Dean had searched during the past ten days and had to admit there wasn't much left of the Sammy he'd protected all these years. Gone were the days when he would look to Dean for comfort or help. Sam had become his own man, had been doing it for some time but he just hadn't wanted to admit it. "I bet you're proud Dad, he turned out better than you could have ever hoped. But I wish…" Dean never finished the sentence. It didn't matter what he wanted—never did really. He'd have to learn to deal with his brother as he is now, not as he was in the past.

The older Winchester took another sip of the now luke-warm beer. He grimaced in distaste but emptied the rest of the brew just the same. It was another thing he couldn't explain. He always seemed to be hungry and thirsty. The real problem was Dean felt out of control and he didn't know how to get it back. Maybe he never would…

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Bobby frowned when the youngest Winchester still didn't appear. He'd talked Dean into going to bed shortly after midnight with the assurance he'd wake him as soon as Sam returned. That had been over four hours ago. He fingered the cell phone in his hand. If he called the young hunter would he answer? Sam had become a lot like his father. He wouldn't answer the phone until he was ready. It was one of the traits the old hunter wished his friend hadn't picked up on.

But now that Dean was back in the picture, maybe Sam would change. Bobby wasn't foolish enough to think the boy would go back to the way he was, too much hand happened. But part of him missed the boy who had followed his big brother around like a puppy dog. There had been an innocence and a softness to him then that was missing now.

It wasn't that Sam didn't care; the boy still felt each death. No, it was more that he had learned to bury his feelings so deep that he came across as cold and uncaring. He was definitely John Winchester's son. No one in the hunting community doubted the boy's loyalty any longer. In fact, the youngest had gained a much earned level of respect for what he'd accomplished.

Still, Bobby knew the old Sammy Winchester was still in there. Buried beneath the blood and sacrifices he'd been forced to make and still scared of what he might become if he ever lost control of his legacy. The freaky powers that had shown up periodically over the past few months were disconcerting. He knew Sam didn't tell him everything, but he heard about some of things that had happened on a hunt. He also knew the boy was afraid of what those powers might do to him and how they made others view him. He just hoped the boy wasn't doing something they would all regret.

Bobby jumped as he felt the phone vibrate in his hand. He'd turned the ringer off so that Dean wouldn't be woken up. He looked towards the bedroom before he answered. "Sam? Where the hell…"

"Bobby—tried to make it back but—too much blood…" Sam's voice was a mere whisper on the other end of the line. It was clear the hunter was badly injured and in need of help.

"Where are you son?" Bobby asked as he pulled out a local map. He listened as Sam gave him the directions and sighed. The kid was still at least forty minutes away.

"Can you stop the bleeding Sam?" Bobby said as he folded the map and reached for his keys.

"Tried—so tired…" Sam's voice dropped off as the sound of the phone hitting the floorboards filled the speaker.

"Sam? Sammy, you hold on you hear. I'll be there as quick as I can…" Bobby jumped as a voice sounded behind him.

"We'll be there. I'm coming Bobby and you can't stop me." Dean remarked as he reached to grab for his coat and keys. He paused for a moment as the old habit reminded him he didn't have either. Sam hadn't given him back his keys or his jacket with the things he'd brought back. But Dean refused to think about that now. He had to get to Sam.

Bobby smiled as he tossed the first aid kit at Dean. "What're you waitin' for boy, let's get…"

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Sam shivered in the front seat of the Impala. He must have blacked out for a moment since he didn't remember dropping the phone. His head was swimming and his vision was definitely not focused as he reached over and loosened the make shift tourniquet he'd made using his belt. "Man Dean is gonna kill me for bleeding all over his baby like this…" Sam whispered.

He felt the blood begin to run down his arm once more as the pain that the restored circulation brought joined the pain from the wounds in an unending symphony of agony. He closed his eyes and bit his lower lip until he tasted blood in his mouth. "Great, just what I need, another leak!"

Sam groaned as his body shivered from the loss of blood and probably shock. He had to get something to keep himself warm until Bobby could get here. As he slowly climbed from the car, he wondered for a minute when he realized his first thought had been to call Bobby. In the past, the first word on his lips would have been Dean.

He decided he needed to get warm first and then worry about how his brother was going to react. He grabbed onto the hood of the car and inched his way to the trunk and the blanket he knew was sitting there. As he fumbled with the keys, he cursed as they fell to the ground from his numb fingers. The young hunter slammed his fist onto the trunk. "Sorry girl…" He immediately apologized as he realized he wasn't mad at the car. He just hated to need help. Ever since Dean—when his brother was gone, he'd worked hard to never need anyone or anything. It hurt too much to become dependent—it was too easily ripped away from him.

As he bent to retrieve the keys, he almost joined them on the ground as the world spun. "Whoa!" Sam mumbled as he pulled himself up once more. He finally managed to get the key in the moving lock. "Gotcha you sneaky son of a bitch!" Sam cried as the key turned and the trunk revealed its contents.

Sam reached with a shaky hand to retrieve the blanket. To get to it, he had to move the leather jacket. As he pushed the jacket aside, he paused as tears gathered for a brief moment in his eyes. A feeling he hadn't allowed for months resurfaced as he grabbed the jacket and pulled it to him. "Dean…" Sam said softly as he sank to the ground in front of the trunk.

Memories of his brother caring for him flashed in his mind as he pulled the jacket closer. Part of him wanted to go back to that place and yet part was frightened to. What happened if Dean left him again? He wasn't sure he could survive it. As he leaned against the trunk, he placed the jacket around him. The warmth that flowed from the worn material came from more than the jacket. He could feel his brother and somehow he knew Dean was coming. "Dean…" Sam whispered again as his eyes finally closed.

TBC

Raven524: Just one more chapter to go in what started as being a one shot and quickly grew into this emotional story. Thanks to all who have been reading and responding. Your encouragement makes writing a pleasure!


	7. Chapter 7 Finding Normal

Disclaimer: I still don't own Supernatural or its characters

**Disclaimer:** I _still_ don't own Supernatural or its characters. I and am not making any money on this…I'm just having fun!

**Redemption of a Lost Soul**

**Chapter 7 – Finding Normal**

Dean tapped his leg as Bobby drove through the night. As he watched the miles go by he couldn't help but feel guilty about not being with his brother. He never should have let Sam go alone. While he'd been sleeping, his brother had been hurt and bleeding.

"Nothin' you coulda done Dean." Bobby said quietly.

"I never should have let him go on his own." Dean said as he glared at the older hunter.

Bobby just shook his head. He could see the train wreck coming and he for one didn't want to be the conductor of the train. "We'll be there in five more minutes—better keep an eye out. He said he parked in a grove of trees just off the main road."

Dean refocused on the road. A moment later he spotted the trees Sam was talking about. "Over there Bobby…"

The old hunter hadn't even put the truck in park before Dean was out the door and heading for the black car. He smiled for a moment as he noticed how well she'd been kept. It had been too long since he'd seen his baby. But as he approached he noticed the driver was absent. "Sam!" Dean called as he glanced at the driver's seat. A chill went through him when he saw the amount of blood on the seat and door. It was clear his brother was badly injured. He called for Bobby before moving towards the rear of the vehicle. A moment later he saw what he'd been looking for.

"Sammy!" Dean knelt beside the unconscious form of his brother. He could see the sweat on his face along with traces of blood smeared across the pale features. He reached forward and felt for a pulse, relieved when he found one followed by a low moan.

"That's it kiddo, you need to wake up for me now." Dean said gently as he noticed what Sam was holding onto. A small smile crossed his lips as he pulled the jacket back to check for his brother's injuries. Maybe Sam did still want him, even if he didn't need him.

"Dean?" Sam moaned as hazel eyes blinked and finally focused on the older hunter.

"Well who else would come out at this hour to save your ass. Seriously Sam, you better not have gotten any blood on her or you'll be washing her for a month…" Dean fell into the old routine faster than he thought he would. His first inclination was to ask why the hell his brother had left him behind. But he knew now wasn't the time for that conversation.

First he'd patch the kid up and then he'd beat some sense into his thick skull. He saw the belt tightened around his brother's left arm. Sucking in a swift breath, he gently loosened it and wasn't surprised to see the blood begin to flow. His brother had a nasty set of gashes running from his shoulder to his wrist. "Looks like you forgot to give the doggie his bone before you killed him huh?"

"Two of them…" Sam muttered as he winced.

Dean stopped and sat back to look at his brother. "Two of them? What were you thinking Sam?"

Sam blinked at his brother's tone and bristled. "I was thinking one wasn't a big enough challenge. I can take care of myself Dean." Sam began to push Dean aside as he struggled to get to his feet.

Dean sucked in a breath. He had forgotten how touchy Sam could be when he was hurting. "Easy little brother. I wasn't questioning your ability. Just take it easy or you'll bleed out faster."

Sam sighed as he allowed his older brother to help him to the bed of Bobby's truck. The old hunter had already gotten the first aid kit ready. "Stitches?" Bobby asked Dean without looking at Sam.

"I think so, but we need to get his shirt off first. I need to see what we're dealing with here." Dean replied as he pulled out his knife and began to cut through the top of the sleeve of Sam's shirt. Sam groaned softly as the fabric was removed from his sore arm.

"Jeez Sam, he really got you pretty good. But don't worry, we can fix this." Dean said softly as he placed a hand on Sam's shoulder. For a brief moment, Sam allowed himself to lean into the comfort being offered before he straightened up once more.

"Just clean it and stitch it up…" Sam said as he prepared himself for the pain.

Dean shook his head but did what his little brother asked. He cleaned the wounds out with holy water, wincing as he saw the smoke pour from the wounds. Sam bit his bottom lip, but remained stoic as Dean continued to clean the claw marks. When he was sure they were clean, the older Winchester pulled out the needle and thread. "You want something for the pain Sammy?" Dean asked as he checked to see if Bobby had a local numbing agent.

"No, just get it over with." Sam said through gritted teeth.

"You don't have to be in pain boy. Dean use the local while I get the idjit some antibiotics and pain pills." Bobby held up his hand at the objection he could see on the young man's lips. "I don't want no arguments from you boy. Your body is going into shock and we don't need to add to it by having you in pain."

Sam smiled softly as he watched his old friend head for the truck to get the water. "You know, some people get more mellow with age…" Sam remarked as he looked at Dean.

"You better not let Bobby hear that—mellow isn't exactly a word I'd associate with him." Dean grinned back at the private joke between the two of them.

"What are you two grinnin' about?" Bobby asked as he passed the pills to Sam followed by the water.

"Nothing" Both boys replied in unison followed by a brief bout of giggles.

"Nothin' my ass…" Bobby mumbled as he shoved his cap back on his head and glared at the two men.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Dean looked beside him and for the first time in a while he felt a part of him heal. He was driving his baby again and his brother was beside him in the passenger seat. His leather jacket was draped over his baby brother's shoulders to keep him warm. "Just like old times huh girl?" Dean said as he ran his hand over the steering wheel.

"You two want a room?" The graveled voice said from beside him.

"You're supposed to be sleeping Sam. How's the arm?" Dean asked as he looked over at his younger brother. He could see the slight grimace followed by the sound of a curse word before Sam gave him the standard Winchester answer.

"I'm fine Dean. Just need a little sleep and I'll be good to go." Sam remarked as he looked over at his older brother. A flash of white teeth showed as a grin formed on the pain filled face.

"I tried to keep her up for you Dean. I mean, I did organize the trunk a bit. But otherwise she'd just like you left her…" Sam swallowed as he looked out the window.

"Why Sam?" Dean asked softly as he looked at his brother. He could see the confusion in the hazel eyes. "Why did you keep her the same—she was yours after I—well afterwards…" Dean still couldn't say it. It would make it too real somehow.

Sam sighed and looked out the windshield for a moment before he answered. "I don't know. I mean, part of me never really gave up Dean. I always kept looking for a way to get you back. Bobby and I had found more than one ritual that would reunite your soul. But first we had to find your body and then, well we should have had to find your soul but then you woke up and…well now you're here."

Dean swallowed as he realized his brother had never given up on him. He didn't know why, but he felt something else that had been missing fall back in place. "Thanks Sam."

Sam just nodded as he let his head fall back against the seat. "Think I'll rest for a bit—we good Dean?" Sam asked a little uncertainly.

Dean sighed. "We're good Sam. Now rest, we'll be back at the cabin in no time."

A short time later Dean pulled his car beside Bobby's truck; it took both men to get Sam inside and into bed. It was obvious his brother was suffering from blood loss and possibly shock. "Do you think we should take him to the hospital?" Dean asked Bobby as he smoothed Sam's hair from his sweat soaked forehead. Now that they were no longer wanted fugitives, it felt good to have that option again.

"I already gave him something for the pain and fever. Why don't we give it a day and see if he improves. You know how he hates hospitals…" Bobby remarked as he stood and moved towards the kitchen. "I don't know about you, but I need a strong cup of caffeine…"

"Sounds good Bobby—and Bobby?" Dean watched the old hunter turn. "Thanks…"

Bobby simply growled something about thick headed Winchesters needing to stay out trouble being the only thanks he needed as he headed into the other room. Dean smiled fondly at the man who had become like a second father to him. He turned as he heard a soft moan from his brother's bed.

"Sammy?" Dean said softly as he sat down on the edge of the bed. His brother's hazel eyes blinked a few times before they finally focused on him. "Take it easy little brother. You're torn up a bit and you have a fever but Dr. Bobby seems to think you'll be just fine."

Sam reached his hand out and grasped Dean's wrist tightly in his own. He held it for a moment before he relaxed. "Thought it was just a dream—you really are here…" Sam muttered as he licked dry lips. Dean picked up the bottle of water Bobby had left and held it to his brother's lips.

"Nice and slow Sam. Don't drink it too fast or you'll be bringing it right back up." Dean said as he helped him. "I'm not going anywhere Sam, not as long as you want me to be here…" Dean looked away for a moment, his own fears of being left alone surged forward and almost took his breath away.

He jumped when he felt his brother grab his arm. "Don't go Dean. I can't—I can't do this without you…"

Dean sighed as he replaced the cap on the bottle. "Sure you can Sam. Bobby's told me what a great job you've been doing. Hell you took on two black dogs and lived to bleed all over my car—which you will be cleaning once you feel better." Dean watched and was rewarded with his brother's eye roll. Well maybe not everything had changed. "Just rest now and we can talk when you're feeling better…"

But Sam was stubborn as usual and seemed to have more to say as he refused to release Dean's arm. "No, you can't leave me again Dean. Please promise me—no more deals, no more shortcuts to save my life. I don't know how or why you're back, but I do know I can't lose you again. Not like that." Sam's eyes drooped with fatigue but he forced them open again.

"But you don't need me Sam. You can do this on your own now. I'll understand if you want to continue fighting on your own—I won't like it, but I understand." Dean wanted to demand that Sam never hunt alone again, but he knew that wasn't fair. His brother had grown up and deserved to be treated as an equal.

He heard his brother sigh before he looked away. "I hunted alone because no one could be you Dean—if I can't fight beside you then I fight alone."

"Then why did you go by yourself tonight Sam? Why didn't you wait for me?" Dean finally asked. "Why did you call Bobby instead of me? The hurt he'd felt finally broke free for a moment as he tried to understand his new role.

"Dean, I didn't ask you to come with because you're still hurt and I knew it was a black dog. After last night's nightmare, I didn't think you'd want to face one so soon—I mean it might remind you of what happened. Believe me; I would have loved to have you there, especially after the second one decided to make an unannounced appearance." Sam paused and wiped the sweat from his face with a shaky hand. Dean could kick himself for forcing his brother to have this conversation now. He needed to rest.

"Sam, we can talk about this later. You need to get some sleep." Dean tried to stand but once again his brother grabbed his arm.

"No, you wouldn't let me talk before and I never got a chance. Never got to tell you how much you mean to me Dean, how much I appreciate everything you've given up and done. You're my big brother and nothing can change that." Sam's eyes shown with unshed tears as he looked at Dean.

"I know kiddo—I've always known. You don't need to tell me." Dean was getting uncomfortable and tried to deflect the feelings like he'd always done. "Sounds to me like you've been listening to too much of that emo music on my car stereo." The older hunter saw his brother's sigh but still continued. "You did! Man, I'm gonna have to exorcise the car of that demon music before we go on our next gig."

"I'm serious Dean. I didn't call you because I—well when you were gone there was only Bobby. I'm sorry, it wasn't done to hurt you." Sam looked away for a moment and groaned softly as he shifted his sore arm.

"I know kid, don't worry about it. Just close your eyes and get some sleep. We have plenty of time to discuss this." Dean smiled as he realized that what he said was true. For some reason, he'd been given a second chance. A chance that meant he and his brother would have time to figure this out. As he saw a small smile form on his brother's face and he realized Sam knew it too.

"My coat Dean—can you bring me my coat?" Sam tried to sit up but Dean pushed him gently back onto the bed.

"No way Sam, you're not going anywhere for at least a couple more days." He stood back and crossed his arms. Sam may have grown up, but he was still the big brother.

"Please Dean; I just need something from it. Then I'll rest—I promise." Sam closed his eyes briefly but opened them again to gaze at Dean.

"Okay, just a minute." Damn puppy dog eyes still could get him to do things; something else that hadn't changed. Dean walked across the room and grabbed the coat from the pile of clothes Bobby had dumped their earlier. He shuddered at the blood stains that covered the front. "I think you're gonna need a new one kid."

Sam didn't respond but took the jacket and dug inside the inner pocket. Dean looked on curiously as he saw his brother's fist close over whatever it was for a moment before he motioned for Dean to come closer. "I kept this for you—I think it's time you took it back."

Dean felt his heart in his throat as he saw the small pendant in his brother's large hand. His own hand moved to his throat as if he could still feel it hanging there. "Thanks Sam" Dean said simply as he slipped the leather cord over his neck. The pendant Sam had given him when he was a small boy was back where it belonged and so it seemed was Dean.

He watched as Sam nestled down in the bed and closed his eyes one more time. Dean pulled the covers up and couldn't resist running his hand lightly over his brother's long hair. "Sweet dreams Sam—I'll be here when you wake up."

"I know Dean…Thanks" Sam mumbled before his breath evened out and he was asleep.

Dean knew they still had a lot of things to work out and that there was bound to be some issues before they would get back to normal. Too much had happened to both of them. But for now Dean was willing to live in the moment. He had his car, his tunes and most of all he had Sam. It was all he'd ever need.

The End

Raven524: Thanks again to everyone who has read and responded to this story. Don't worry the next story is already in the works. It will be dedicated to sendintheclowns who had the dubious honor of winning me in the auction. It will be called Thief of the Night and should be posted soon.


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